Get Off The Pew

A Christian Educator

2012-02-11T20:36:00.000-08:00

"Diana" is a dedicated teacher. She's exactly the kind of teacher you'd want your kids to have in the classroom. She's kind, smart, disciplined, and she genuinely cares about students. Diana loves Jesus and is a woman of deep unabashed faith.

Christian Educators Association International (CEAI) is an organization whose mission is (according to their website) "To Encourage, Equip and Empower Educators according to Biblical Principles." We are the only professional association for Christians who are called to serve in public schools.

After Diana spent a weekend at a CEAI retreat, she was excited to become a part of the organization. It can be tough to be a Christian teacher in today's public schools. We live in a politically correct world where fear keeps us from expressing our opinions - even when the law provides us the support to do so.

Inspired and fired up after the encouraging retreat weekend, Diana decided to plug into the resources made available to her through CEAI. She hoped to build lasting relationships with other like-minded Christian educators.

But there was a problem. Diana is gay.

The CEAI leadership opened their arms to Diana, but they said they were afraid the other members might be uncomfortable if Diana were at Bible studies or small group gatherings. You know, when I'm in a room with other people, I never think twice about what they do or do not do in the bedroom, so I can't imagine what could be "uncomfortable" about hanging out with Diana!

Christian teachers need all the support, encouragement, and legal know-how they can gather. They can be woefully ill prepared to go toe to toe with a bully principal who tries to hush their faith in the classroom.

Why can't we come together because we love Jesus and He loves us? Let's keep our eyes on the commonalities and shared beliefs. Let us hold one another's hand as we navigate the sometimes scary and confusing walk of faith.

Get off the pew. Take someone's hand!

God Speaks via my Television

2012-01-21T14:31:00.000-08:00

I wake up this morning and decide it's just too cold to get out of bed. So, I scootch (according to the Urban Dictionary, it's a real word) further under the covers, and then turn on the television. I'm thinking I might catch a bit of news before the Saturday morning cartoons take over the airwaves.

My Vizio monitor snaps to attention, and THIS is what I see on the TV screen:

Really? Wow, it's awfully early, and I'm not fully awake, but okay! Let's go. I mean, God needs ME!

Now I'm tuned in to the fact that a bad recording of an old hymn is playing in the background. The screen shot changes. I see this:

God needs me to "Broadcast Nonstop Prayers Into Every Home...Every Where". Every home? Every where? Should "Every Where" be one word?

Okay, now I'm up. God needs me!

It Gets Better?

2012-01-20T12:48:00.000-08:00

It's not often that a teen boy's suicide makes national and international news, but that's exactly what has happened in the case of 19-year-old gay teen, Eric James Borges. EricJames - as his friends knew him - died January 11, 2012 in California.

EricJames was a source of strength and encouragement to the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender (LGBT) community. He spoke out on his "It Gets Better" video, where he shared his own story of being bullied from an early age, and eventually being disowned by his fundamentalist Christian family.

He says his mother prayed for him and tried to exorcise the evil spirit of homosexuality from him. He was kicked out of the family home just a few months before he killed himself.

I have no intention of entering into a debate about the rightness or wrongness of homosexuality. This isn't about that. This is about the tragic death of a young man, who apparently felt hopeless, lost, disenfranchised, marginalized, and bullied to the point of desperation.

One of our favorite Christian bumper-sticker-isms is "Hate the sin, Love the sinner." Did EricJames know he was loved? Were the Christians in his life able to separate "the sin" from "the sinner"? I can't answer those questions, as I wasn't there. All I know for sure is that a young man is dead - and it should not have ended this way.

Today I'm praying for EricJames' family. I can only imagine the broad range of emotions they must be going through - brokenness, sadness, loss, guilt, anger, fear, and the dreaded "what if's".

Please get off the bully pew. Is there an EricJames in your life? I ask that you love him (or her) and please, please love his parents. Get off the pew!

Why I Hate Religion

2012-01-11T13:04:00.001-08:00

Suicide.

2012-01-10T17:05:00.000-08:00

"Marcus" died a few months ago. He leaves behind his wife, "Cindy", and their two grown children.

Marcus killed himself.

The family released very little information about their loved one's death. The paper said he'd suffered from cancer (he did), and the church announced that his death was "unexpected" (it was). But no one told the truth - Marcus committed suicide.

There are still so many stigmas in the church. We claim to be all-forgiving, all-accepting, and all-understanding, but there are still taboos - things we don't admit or share.

Some moms can't publicly acknowledge that her child is living a homosexual lifestyle. I know a dad who teaches a Bible study, but hasn't talked to his only son for many years. He's too ashamed to even ask for prayer. He misses his son terribly, but can't talk to anyone about his anguish. What would people think of him?

My heart breaks for people with deep gaping wounds, and who feel they have nowhere to share their grief. Some are simply too embarrassed to admit the "blight" on the family name.

Suicide is just such a blight.

Well meaning people have told Marcus's wife that she should be comforted by the fact that he's in a "better place". Others rejoice because his death was the end to his earthly suffering. Meanwhile, Cindy is feeling guilty and asks herself what she missed, and if there was something she could have said or done to keep Marcus from ending his life.

She feels she has nowhere to turn.

Get off the pew. Open your hearts and open your arms. Be someone who gives others a safe place to land - a place wherein they can tell the truth with no fear of judgment, condemnation, or behind-the-back whispers.

Get off the pew!

The Hurting People We Never See

2011-10-24T14:31:00.000-07:00

Last month I wrote about my friend's encounter with two busybody church ladies, and what happened when they literally backed into one another. One woman insisted the other was lying about the circumstances surrounding the parking lot fender bender, and was going to "tell Pastor Dave" about the deceiver.

My friend is an officer who, after more than 30 years, he has seen it all. But, it's the nasty trash talk that comes out of the mouths of so-called "Christians" that continues to dismay and confound him.

He worked a minor car accident the other day in which a truck driver was sideswiped by a passing vehicle while standing outside his truck. He's lucky his injuries were minor. Anyway, he was a large man, and he was missing a few teeth. These facts are important to the story.

My friend was taking the accident report from the visibly shaken man. When asked if there were any witnesses, he said his driving partner had seen the whole thing from his seat inside the stalled truck. Before speaking with the witness, the officer chatted a bit more with the victim, and he was struck by how kind he was. He wasn't angry with the driver who clipped him, but in fact he was concerned for the man's well being.

The officer complimented him on his gentle spirit and remarked at how calm he was. He said, "My partner is the angry, mouthy one. I find it easier to just relax and try to be a gentler person." He explained that the man who often accompanies him on long-distance trips could be a preacher because he knows the Bible so well. However, he always makes fun of people who are "fat" or "ugly".

As the sweet man nursed his wounded arm, he continued the conversation.

"My wife is overweight and she's very, very self-conscious. She is the kindest and most beautiful woman in the world - to me. However, she rarely leaves the house because of people like my friend over there."

The officer listened sympathetically.

"That man claims he's a Christian, but the words that come out of his mouth are cruel and ugly. It's hard for me to travel with him because I know it's because of guys like him that keep my wife from even going to church. He even makes fun of me sometimes." Apparently the guy tries to share the gospel, but his testimony is clearly overshadowed by his mean spirit.

My friend never did quite understand why the gentle, albeit scraggly, trucker had to share the cab of the eighteen-wheeler with the caustic Christian, but he felt his pain.

I don't care how much someone knows about the Bible. People don't care about how much you know; they need to know how much you care.

Every time you're tempted to make a joke about someone's appearance, think about the "kindest and most beautiful woman in the world" who can't even leave her home because of people like you.

Now, get off the pew and be kind to someone today.

Christian Isolationism

2011-10-20T17:34:00.000-07:00

I attended a church event last weekend with an unchurched friend. It's always interesting to see us through someone else's eyes, and I love hanging out with straight-talking non-believers. You know, we really can be an odd bunch of people.

We speak a unique language called "Christianese" and we sing songs about blood and bruises and blindness. Our concerns are not the same as the burdens of the world, and my friend had a difficult time understanding a few things.

A well-known Hollywood actor spoke at last weekend's event. At one point she opened the floor up to audience questions. The attendees wanted to know which actors were Christians and how to get their children involved in God-endorsed film projects.

This line of questioning greatly offended my friend. She couldn't quite understand how it is that we talk about being salt and light in the world, and yet work so hard to isolate ourselves from the very people who need the salt and light.

She's got a good point.

I remember an old camp song called, "Pass It On". The song begins with the words, "It only takes a spark to get a fire going, and soon all those around can warm up in its glowing." We used to sing that song like we believed it. But do we?

We preach sermons, teach classes, write blog posts, and challenge our kids to take the light of Jesus into a dark world. And yet, we can be the biggest isolationists. So, it's okay to be an actor, but only if we work with other believing actors in Christian film projects? What about doctors, lawyers, teachers, singers, and garbage collectors? Are they expected to treat, defend, teach, entertain, and serve believers only?

We talk about being an ocean of love, but many of us feel safer on our own island of like-minded separatists.

Yes, I love seeing us through the eyes of the unchurched. They challenge me to get off the pew of isolationism, and walk in the light of truth. Pass it on.

An Excuse Called Grace

2011-10-14T07:16:00.000-07:00

"Christians use grace as a blanket under which to hide all their sins."

Ouch.

I've written on this topic before, but it keeps rearing its ugly head. Many non-believers don't see grace as a free gift from God, but rather an excuse Christians use to cover bad behavior. My conversation with an unchurched friend of mine reminded me that this view of grace is very common.

When I've broached this topic with believers I often get the same response - "Don't look to people, look to Jesus." I remind you that the lost are looking to us hoping to SEE Jesus!

I'm going to try to put this in terms we all understand. I know quite a few vegetarians. In fact, I grew up in a meat-free home. Imagine knowing your best friend is a vegetarian, but one day you go out to dinner and he orders a steak. A few days later, you have lunch and you're surprised to see him order a big, juicy burger with all the toppings.

Your friend still tells people he's a vegetarian, but you doubt his commitment–what with all the meat eating. So, you question your friend about his commitment to the lifestyle. He responds with something like this: "Don't look to me, look to the vegetarian philosophy for truth and enlightenment. I'm not perfect, just forgiven."

After watching your friend enjoy a few slabs of prime rib, you finally realize he's NOT a vegetarian. He might want to be. He may claim to be. But, he's not. Does that seem judgmental? Not at all. He talks the talk, but he doesn't walk the walk.

If you consistently gossip, cheat on your taxes, lie to your boss about being sick, judge others, harbor angry bitterness, refuse to forgive, or are filled with pride and think yourself better than others, you might not be a Christian. You might want to be. You may claim to be. But you might not be.

Grace is a gift that God offers you and me. It is an honor for us to show grace to someone else who might be going through a valley of trial or temptation. It is not an excuse we pull out of our back pocket for our unChrist-like antics.

Like it or not, people are looking to us for hope. They want to see Jesus. I know we're not perfect and they know we're not perfect. When we mess up we need to 'fess up.

Get off the pew of excuses!

The Mormon "Cult"

2011-10-10T12:39:00.000-07:00

So, Pastor Robert Jeffress of Dallas, Texas calls Mormonism a "cult". He has endorsed Governor Rick Perry as the Republican Presidential candidate because he's a conservative Christian, but warns believers against voting for candidate Mitt Romney because he's a Mormon.

Well, I'm not going to enter the "cult" debate. I'm well aware of the fact that many Christians agree with Pastor Jeffress. I'm more concerned about our bigotry.

During the election season of 1960, many Christian pastors and leaders warned the American voter against supporting John F. Kennedy. You see, he was a Catholic. America had never had a Catholic president. Many believed (and still believe) that The Pope was the antichrist.

President Kennedy was way before my time, but my study of American history tells me that the Christian fear mongering of that time is similar to what's happening today. I would hope that we would cast our vote based on an intelligent understanding of where a candidate stands on issues.

Look, the conservative Christian candidate is going to make judgment calls and cast votes based on his or her knowledge of the issue as seen through the prism of their Christian worldview. Likewise, the atheist, Buddhist, Mormon, Catholic, heathen, etc... will make personal and political choices that grow from their heart, beliefs, and personal worldview. We the voters must do our homework, find out where the candidate stands, and vote our conscience.

I know many Mormons. They are loving, concerned, generous, thoughtful, kind, and smart. I also know many Christians, atheists, Catholics, and heathens who are all those things. Once again, however, it's the Christian pastor who comes across as sounding judgmental and small-minded.

So, Pastor Jeffress, teach your congregation to walk as Jesus walked, love as Jesus loved, and vote as Jesus might have voted. Voting against Mr. Romney just because of his religion is not an informed vote–it's a bigoted vote.

Get off the pew of bigotry.

Clueless Cleric

2011-10-04T09:30:00.000-07:00

Our children decided when they were teens that they wanted nothing to do with The Church. Pastors, parishioners, and pew sitters were judgmental hypocrites who would rather point fingers than build relationship.

That, sadly, was our church experience.

The other night I went to an event and sat at a table with a former nemesis – the pastor who decided I should be fired from my church job because I got involved with community theatre. Our kids were devastated when they watched the pastor's critical condemnations break my heart and spirit. I was angry at the time, not only because of how he treated me, but because his actions so profoundly and negatively affected our kids and their faith.

Despite the pain of the past, I'm always cautiously open to restoration. My former boss asked about the kids. I shared their comings and goings, including the fact that one of our kids is an atheist.

"You know," said the man, "one of our sons had doubts about his faith when he was fired from a church and treated so unfairly."

Now, at this point in the conversation I could have said, "Hmmmm....what a coincidence. You're the one whose actions caused my children to lose their faith."

But I chose to listen.

He proceeded to tell me just a bit more about how hurt his son had been and how he again found his faith. I realized that he's clueless as to how his behavior affects people. He doesn't see himself in the actions of others.

I love the book UnChristian by David Kinnaman and Gabe Lyons. The book reveals the results of research that exposes how church outsiders see Christians, and how very clueless we are about how we are being perceived. I could've written that book a decade ago, and I don't need the Barna Group to give me research data. I've witnessed unimaginable hypocrisy first hand. According to the book and the data they collected, church leaders are woefully unaware of how their actions negatively impact both insiders and outsiders.

Get off the pew and look in the mirror. We are being watched, examined, hated, loved, emulated, and shunned. We're going to mess up, and when we do, we need to fess up. Being Jesus with skin on isn't easy, but it's who we ought to be.

Get off the pew!

Relying On The Kindness of Strangers

2011-09-29T16:26:00.000-07:00

Several of my friends are looking for work. Many more are underemployed.

These are tough financial times, and more than ever we need one another. In the Tennessee Williams play, "A Streetcar Named Desire" a fading but still attractive Blanche Dubois explains how she survives when she says, "I always depended on the kindness of strangers."

My friend "John" was laid off from the job he loved a little over three years ago. He was asked to appear on stage at his church in a presentation of "cardboard testimonies". I think most of us have seen these displays. The choir sings an appropriately emotionally manipulative song such as "Amazing Grace/My Chains Are Gone" and people appear on stage holding a large cardboard sign. On one side is written a confession or need, and on the other side - words of hope.

The pastor of John's mega-church asked him to participate in Cardboard-Sunday just a few weeks after he became unemployed. The words, "I just lost my job" were written on one side, and "Trusting God" on the other. He, along with more than twenty transparent and hopeful parishioners used simple words to share their heart with a congregation of more than 5,000 that day.

Two weeks later John had lunch with his friend Mark. Mark had to know, "So, did you get a lot of job offers after Cardboard-Sunday?" "You know," John replied, "not even one."

I was surprised by that fact. Five thousand people–brothers and sister in the faith–and not one single person could offer a job lead? Literally hundreds of the city's leaders, business owners, and movers and shakers claim this particular church as their own. I know many of them were sitting in the pews that day.

There was a time when the church rallied to help their own in times of need. Then the government began offering welfare and food stamps to help the poor and indigent. The Church threw up their hands and seemed to say, "Whew! Helping the needy is no longer our job."

Blanche Dubois relied on the kindness of strangers. I wonder if The Church had failed her.

It's been three years since John poured his heart out onto a large chunk of cardboard. His family still struggles as John continues to look for work. Life is further complicated by health problems, broken cars, and leaky house pipes they can't afford to repair.

I believe that if a need has made its way into my circle of knowledge and influence, then I'm supposed to respond. I can ask around, spread the word, donate a little money here and there, send a card of encouragement, pray, pray, and pray.

Get off the pew, look around, really see the needs in your circle of knowledge and influence, and then respond. Get off the pew!

Truth In The Text

2011-09-17T08:07:00.000-07:00

I received the following text message from my friend, who happens to be a highway patrol officer:

I have decided that a lot of church people are the meanest people I know. I worked this crash at $#@%&* Church where two woman backed out of a stall and hit each other. One woman just informed me she is going to tell "Pastor Dave" about this, because the other woman is lying, etc. I'm like REALLY!!?? Geez! All this woman wants to do is trash this other woman, and it's a tiny fender bender! Both at fault. I told her I based my conclusion on the physical evidence and HER statement too!

My officer friend is a very spiritual person, but wants nothing to do with church. Guess what, that strong opinion still holds–and with good reason. The text message continues:

I told her it's a small little accident and there is no need for this to escalate. Oh no, not good enough! Now it's going to be a full blown church fight.

My friend is very aware of the abuse my family has suffered at the hands of so-called Christians. I want to believe that our story is not the norm, but evidence continues to point to so much deep-seated arrogance and dysfunction among believers. My friend's text goes on:

So, it all reminded me of all that crap with you and your church and I felt like I wanted to just hug U....and kick this mean woman. She is just a shit stirrer. It's like junior high. I mean, this grown woman is running to the pastor like a child when it doesn't even involve the church. She just wants to hurt the other woman.

Once again...Christians have the opportunity to model who Jesus is for the unchurched, and we blow it. The patrol officer nailed it. So many problems are caused when immature Christians run to pastors to fix problems that should be resolved solely by the two people involved.

My friend's final observation:

It's no wonder pastors get big heads when their members run to them like kids every time someone looks at them sideways.

Ouch. Get off the pew. Resolve a conflict, restore a relationship, and renew your commitment to be Jesus with skin on. And next time you're involved in a little game of bumper cars out there on the road, remember that you might've just been given the opportunity to witness to the investigating officer. What a privilege.

When Pastors Choose Our Friends

2011-09-10T11:23:00.000-07:00

Is it ever okay for a pastor to tell a parishioner who said parishioner can and cannot have as a friend?

An acquaintance of mine was in the middle of a casual conversation with her pastor the other day, when he told her that he would rather she not be friends with someone. She became understandably defensive.

“Are you really telling me with whom I can be friends?”

“I’m just telling you to be careful.” He went on to explain how the person in question was an inferior Christian and therefore – inferior friend material.

Jesus modeled for us the example of how to be friends with people we “ought not” be friends with. Jesus was totally politically incorrect when he approached the Samaritan woman at the well. He talked with her, encouraged her, challenged her, and then sent her off to become the first evangelist.

Many of the Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony, “He told me everything I ever did.” John 4:39

When we stand in the way of friendships, we reveal our own insecurities, judgmental heart, critical spirit, and phobias. So many pastors have become arrogant and prideful. They seem to truly believe they and they alone know how to make right and good choices.

The number of pastor/teachers who seem to believe it’s their God-given right to literally direct every aspect of the believer’s life shouldn’t surprise me. I see it all the time.

Get off the pew and go make an unlikely friend today. Go. Go!

The Tithing Kiosk

2011-08-21T12:04:00.000-07:00

Well, we knew this day would eventually come, as we are a mostly cashless society now. That truth, frankly, is an easy excuse to not tithe, give, or donate. "Oh, I forgot to stop by the ATM on my way to church this morning and I ran out of checks a year ago. Sorry, I can't contribute to the offering plate today."

So, what is the answer to the I-don't-have-cash-on-me dilemma? The Tithing Kiosk.

I wonder...will people start impulse tithing? Will parishioners call the church office on Monday morning demanding a refund because they find themselves suffering from giver's remorse?

Now that the Tithing Kiosk has been installed, I fully expect giving to go up substantially. We love giving to God's work, we love our debit cards, and we love machines. Well, this is a win/win.

Art - Takin' it back!

2011-08-17T16:45:00.000-07:00

Art in the church. For as long as I can remember, this has been a controversial and often adversarial subject.

I remember when I was pre-teen a music group was set to perform at our church. My family arrived early that evening because my mom was a greeter and my dad operated the sound system - which consisted of four microphones, four knobs, and one on/off switch.

The singing group arrived and before long all twelve members (six men and six women) were dressed in their matching lavender-colored maxi-dresses, polyester suits, and perfectly coiffed hair-dos. The piano player sat down at the baby grand to make sure the instrument was tuned to his satisfaction, a couple of players tightened the loose strings on their guitars, and then...dun dun dun. Are those drums?

The pastor stuck his head into the still mostly empty sanctuary, called the leader of the group aside. In a hushed whisper he informed the young director that drums were not welcome in this here church. "Those are tools of the devil."

True story.

Now days you can find a drum kit on nearly every single church platform in America - except of course, congregations associated with The Church of Christ, as they don't play musical instruments. It seems odd to me that rhythm instruments were not allowed in most churches until fairly recently considering the Psalmist says, "Praise him with crashing cymbals". He encourages us to praise Him with dancing, with stringed instruments, with the tambourine, with the harp, and with the trumpet. That's Psalm 150, by the way.

It wasn't until the late 1970's and early '80's that live drama became more of a church mainstay. I knew pastors in that era, however, who still preached against going to the movies or secular live theatre venues to see plays or musicals.

I believe all things were created by God, through God, and for God. I believe it because the Bible tells us so. Yes, He even created Hollywood, Broadway, Bollywood, and small town community theatre companies everywhere. I believe God Himself gifted Picasso, Rembrandt, Da Vinci, Van Gogh, and Monet with immeasurable artistic talent. God poured music into the hearts, minds, and piano playing fingers of Liberace, Barry Manilow, and Billy Joel. He created Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, and Kurt Cobain.

Yes, art was created by God as a gift to His kids–a gift of beauty, inspiration, joy, excitement, energy, and life. School districts have cut their budgets down to nubbins, and art education is always the first to go. Perhaps it's time the church takes back that which we have so readily handed over to the world.

Proverbs tells us to "train up a child in the way he should go [according to his bent] and when he is old he will not turn away". The artists among us are being turned away - by the schools and by the church. I say we take seriously the admonition to train up these talented young people. We can nurture their talent and teach them God's amazing and unconditional awesomeness.

Come on Church. Get off the pew and start a children's choir, create a theatre company, find a place for young filmmakers, and teach young musicians. Find instructors who not only have "a heart for the ministry", but the talent and education needed to train up quality artists. There's nothing worse than the bless-his-heart-he-tries church artist. We're representing the God of the Universe, for heaven's sake. We need to bring in the first string players on this one.

I say it's time The Church takes back art. It is, after all, God's gift to us. We have no business complaining about the movies, television, music, plays, and comedy offerings out there today when we're just sitting in our pews and on our hands and not creating superior alternatives.

Get off the pew!

Christianity's Greatest Enemy

2011-08-09T15:48:00.000-07:00

What is Christianity's biggest enemy today? Would you say it's Islam? Maybe it's Hinduism, Satanism, Atheism, or the entire Democratic Party. Perhaps you believe our enemies are members of the liberal media, scientists, HBO, The Rainbow Coalition, Al Gore, or The Walt Disney Corporation.

My answer might surprise you.

I think Christianity's greatest enemy is the Prosperity Gospel.

The faithful and hopeful are looking to Benny Hinn, Kenneth Copeland, Joel Osteen, and the like to inspire them and to build their faith. If you just "have faith" the money will come, you will be healed, and all good will come to you. I wonder how these men would council the apostle Paul whose faith could not cure the "thorn" in his flesh, or keep him out of prison.

Of course there are Faith "Hall of Famers" who were definitely prosperous by the world's standards. I think of Abraham, David, Isaac, Job, and Solomon - just to name a few. But again, their faith could not shield them against tragedy, loss, brokenness, and deep heartache. Financial gain does not guard against sadness and disappointment.

This past weekend I attended a conference at a mega church in Southern California. As is always the case at these gatherings, there were several offerings taken through out the course of the two days. Each time the pastor took the stage before the passing of the buckets (or joy bags), he offered words of encouragement––a rally call of sorts. He told us how he and his wife now give 50% of their income to the Lord. Just last week he spoke at another church and one woman was so inspired by his message that she wrote a personal check for $20,000. This, he assured us, is what happens when you give your money away.

My friend has been attending this church for fifteen years and she gives a great deal to the ministry because of its unique outreach goals. She's also $50,000 in debt. She believes that Jesus is coming soon and she accepts the fact that she'll never be out of debt, so why worry?

Psalm 37:21 says, The wicked borrow and do not repay, but the righteous give generously. It seems that we easily claim the second half of that verse, but gloss over the first half.

I've seen an awful lot of people give a great deal of money to ministries they whole-heartily believe in. But in the end, the ministry and its leader gets fat and prosperous, while the giver is left with an empty wallet and a broken heart. This just isn't okay.

Should we give to the poor? Of course! But, look at Proverbs 22:16–One who oppresses the poor to increase his wealth and one who gives to the rich–both come to poverty. Wow! Many of these prosperity gospel teachers do not see themselves as rich, but compared to the majority of their givers, their lives are opulent (generally speaking). When we give to the rich, we will come to poverty! Scary.

Do I believe in tithing? Yes. Do I think we should give to the poor? Yes. Do I agree our troubles are a direct result of our lack of faith? Occasionally. For the most part, however, this is life. We will have struggles and challenges and setbacks. When preachers add to the burden of our troubles by heaping guilt on us isn't fair, isn't right, and isn't Biblical.

Get off the pew and do what is right. Get out of debt so that you can give freely and without fear or anxiety. And remember; When you give to the needy, do not let your right hand know what your left hand is doing so that your giving may be in secret. Then your father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. Matthew 6:3-4.

Kingdom Minded or Church Minded?

2011-08-06T12:00:00.000-07:00

It seems that every few months a new catchphrase rides a wave and washes over every church activity or gathering I encounter. Pastors jump on the catchphrase ship and sail out into the sermon ocean in hopes of capitalizing on the latest spiritually edifying craze.

Pastors, teachers, and Bible study leaders delve into, study, and impart their Christianese wisdom on topics like, "Let go and let God"; "What would Jesus do?"; "On becoming the emerging church", "It's not religion, it's a relationship", etc...

Lately, I've encountered a number of conversations and messages that could be titled, "Kingdom-minded, or church-minded?" Under which category do you think your church falls? I've been attending a few different churches in the past couple of years, and I see a huge chasm filled with differences between the two types of congregations.

The Kingdom-minded congregation recognizes that everything you do - where you work, where you live, and how you spend your leisure time - affords opportunities to be Jesus with skin on to the people with whom you come in contact. The church-minded body attempts to micromanage your life outside of Sunday, i.e., discouraging certain activities and friendships.

The Kingdom-minded church understands that God can use non-believers to teach and enlighten. The church-minded pastor refuses to read leadership books or attend conferences written by or featuring non-Christian speakers - regardless of their intelligence or experience.

A women's ministry director removed one of her leadership team members because she began attending Sunday services at another church. But wait. Are we not all one body? The church is not a building, but rather a family of believers from all over the world and from all walks of life, economic stations, experiences, and cultures, right? This women's ministry director is church-minded, and not Kingdom-minded.

So, of what mind are you? Is your loyalty to Father and His purposes, or to a pastor and his human whims and wishes? Do you live in legalistic bondage to a church, or the freedom and grace gifted to you by the King of Kings and Lord of Lords?

Get off the pew and pray for the heart and mind of Christ.

Small Decision - Eternal Consequence

2011-07-14T14:49:00.000-07:00

A pastor was quoted in the Religion section of the local paper.

[My mentor] taught me to be careful of even the small decisions because they could have great consequences in the future. You could have a bad day, but you need to be careful.

Great quote, right? Sound advice, don't you think? Except that this particular pastor has a long history of NOT following this thoughtful admonition. His inability to engage in loving confrontation is legendary. All over this city you can find wounded soldiers bleeding and suffering from his verbal stabbings and harsh condemnation.

Our own children walked away from the Lord after this particular pastor made a choice about me, which was based on completely false information. A small decision made on what was surely a bad day has had eternal consequences for my family.

Sadly, my story isn't unique. My friend's husband left her and she decided to take some time for herself. She'd always loved musical theatre, so she auditioned for a show with the local troupe. The pastor found out, but he didn't approve of the theatre. He kicked her out of the choir and she was encouraged to leave the church. She was left to go through a painful divorce without the love and support of her long-time church family. It took years for her wounds to heal, and today the scars remain.

He once fired a man who'd faithfully served on the church staff for 21 years. He gave no notice and no reason, except that "the time had come" (whatever that means).

A young piano player who was a new believer was excited to be a part of the church worship team. She really loved her new Christian family. One night a musician friend asked her to cover for him at a secular gig. This pastor found out and kicked her off the worship team - leaving the new believer confused, sad, and broken. It was 15 years before she stepped foot in another church.

A woman reported to the pastor that there was evidence that a person on the creative arts team was jealous of her. She manipulated and twisted the facts in order shine a false but incriminating light on the so-called envious one. If the pastor were a good leader, he would have told the informant to go to the other person directly and deal with whatever was going on. That's what Jesus teaches us to do, right? But, not being a fan of confrontation himself, he just fired the other person with no explanation. How do I know? I'm the other person.

Another heart broken, a family displaced, and teen-age kids at a crossroad make a decision to turn as far from God as possible. Who wants to serve a God whose church is so terrible and mean?

If you're a parent, you know how your heart breaks when the kids fight and mistreat one another. Imagine how God feels when his kids hurt each other with such force that the action has eternal consequences. Oh gosh, how sad.

Listen, the pastor's inability to take his own counsel (or that of a teacher) does not lessen the validity of the advice. Indeed, even a small decision can have great consequences in the future.

Get off the pew and (as Dr. Laura would say), go do the right thing.

Charlie Rangel, What?

2011-07-13T08:09:00.000-07:00

Congressman Charlie Rangel is appealing to pastors to ask their congregations, "What would Jesus do?"

Mr. Rangel is suggesting that preachers encourage their congregations to call Republican representatives and implore them to raise taxes so more money can go to help the indigent and needy. This, Mr. Rangel believes, is what Jesus would do.

It's funny that Charlie puts himself out there as an authority of sorts on things Jesus would do. First of all, Rangel has been in big trouble for tax evasion and I'm pretty sure that Jesus denounces that sort of thing. The apostle Paul reiterated this in his letter to the Romans when he said, "If you owe taxes, pay taxes." (Romans 13:7)

James 1:27 instructs us to "look after orphans and widows in their distress". In other words, it is the church - the body of believers - who should be helping, serving, and meeting the needs of the less fortunate, NOT THE GOVERNMENT. So, no Mr. Rangel, I will not be calling my Republican representatives and asking for a tax increase.

Now, I must say here that I do believe the church has dropped the ball in this area. Or, have the needy stopped going to church? It's a complicated issue for sure.

I've seen a lot of financial abuse and ball dropping from the body of Christ. I know a family who has ten children and has been receiving subsidies from the church for many years. Dad works and mom home-schools the kids and they're not particularly needy, they've just had more kids than they can afford. I have trouble understanding how that fact has become the church's burden.

On the other hand, I've seen families whose children were lost to drug addiction. They begged the church for financial help to pay the exorbitant cost of rehabilitation. The church's response? "We don't pay for drug problems." Um.....?

Matthew 6:2-4 tells us to go about giving to the needy and doing so silently and without fanfare. Come on church, get off the pew, help the helpless, love the unlovable, reach out to the lost, and do the right thing. If we all pitch in, there will be no need for the Charlie Rangels of the world to guilt us into handing more of our money over to the government.

You're Son is Reading What?

2011-07-11T08:12:00.000-07:00

My friend Lorie is a Christian singer/songwriter and has been since she was a child. She's now a grown woman with children of her own.

She was recently booked to sing at a church and she brought her kids with her. Her son sat quietly in the front pew while she did her sound check and prepared for the concert.

Now, I happen to have several friends who are singers and musicians, and many of them travel with their young children. Some of the kids are performers-in-training and they immerse themselves in the minutia - from the set-up, to running the sound board, to joining mom or dad on the stage, to tearing down and packing up equipment.

All Lorie's son wanted to do was read. And so, he buried himself in the latest "Harry Potter" novel. Big mistake, huge - at least in the eyes of the church finger-waggers.

Lorie was told she'd never be welcome back to perform for that particular congregation because she had an obvious character flaw - she let her son read "Harry Potter".

Oh, for heaven's sake. No really...for heaven's sake, let this kind of judgmental criticism go. Lorie's passion is to use her talent to tell God's story. When you squash her, you squash an opportunity for someone else to hear God's voice.

Get off the pew!

Not "Suited" for Church

2011-07-04T09:11:00.000-07:00

A well known, revered, and respected pastor died last week. My heart aches for his family and for their loss.

Several people wrote letters of condolence that were then posted in the local paper. One of the writers said, "I never knew him personally, but every time I saw him on television he was wearing a suit. That's how I know he's a man of God - because he wore a suit in church. God's house deserves our respect."

"The Church" is the body of Christ - not a building. Our bodies are called "the temple of God", which indicates to me that I am God's house. A building is just brick, mortar, and glass.

While it's true that this man always wore a suit, I know that was not the criteria by which he'd want his life, teaching, and passion for Christ to be judged. Pastor was from a different time and tradition and even he acknowledged that traditions are fluid and ever changing, but Jesus's message of love, grace, and intimate relationship has never wavered.

Jesus didn't have a pulpit, a building, or a suit. I believe he made those intentional choices so we could walk free from the confines of tradition and rules, and uprightly in an intimate relationship with The Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit. Jesus never dressed like a traditional rabbi.

When I die I sincerely hope no one mentions my style sense, or lack thereof. Get off the pew of tradition and legalism. Jesus desires for you to walk in freedom.

Facebook Platitudes - Just Say No!

2011-06-27T16:28:00.000-07:00

Okay,

So, I was having a bit a rough day over the weekend. I know the small stuff shouldn't bother me, but there are days when I've had enough. Saturday was one such day.

Honestly, if you're going to go to the trouble of hating me, I'd just as soon it be for something I actually did to you personally. I don't even mind those of you who violently disagree with my opinions and beliefs. But if you use gossip to form an opinion about a person, and then you use that "information" to destroy that person's reputation - well that behavior is quite honestly at the bottom of the dung heap.

The weekend brought new, unexpected drama to my life, and I wasn't happy. I posted my frustration for all the world to see on Facebook - never a smart thing.

Well, I got more than a few responses. My cousin believes she's a prophet. Every few months she sends me a note detailing a new and ugly thing the Lord has "shown" her while "in the spirit". At first I tried arguing with her, but that didn't work. She said, "when you decide to see the truth, my dear cousin, I'm here."

Then I tried ignoring my cousin's prophetic ramblings, but they got louder. She took my silence as proof that satan has control over me.

Sadly, I don't respond well to her prophecies and platitudes. I'm easily frustrated by her.

It's easy to see why non-believers see us as crack-pots and arrogant know-it-all's. We assume we know more than they do. We sometimes gloss over their concerns with religious gobbly-gook when a spiritual answer is not even needed.

I've included a snippet of my Facebook post, and a few of the responses, including those from my cousin. She seems to be making wild assumptions. Among them is her apparent belief that she has the answer to finding joy, but I don't. She also throws in the small fact that someone wants to kill her? What?

We've got to love people. Telling them that the way they're feeling is "not true" is probably not the best approach. Get off the pew, people! Love. Respond. Act.

Me (on Facebook):
Not gonna lie...some days are harder than others. Life has taught me that liars win, cheaters come out on top, thieves never have to pay restitution, a reputation stolen can NEVER be replaced, and there are NO defenders for the strong! Please don't respond with spiritual platitudes. Respond with action! #takingresponsibility

Saturday at 3:30pm · Privacy:

Friend, Friend and Friend like this.
- Friend: It sucks when cheaters win.
  Saturday at 3:34pm
- Friend: I've told myself before, when I've had moments like this, "I know where I'll end up after death and at least I have a clean conscience when I meet my maker." I hope that isn't a spiritual platitude for you. It's what got me thru the tough time after my divorce when I wanted to sink down to my ex'es level. He seemed to win all the battles with his dirty play.
  Saturday at 3:45pm ·
- Cousin:
  
  This in NOT true! I am a perfect example ... certain people have lied about me but truth prevailed! People who have cheated in my circle have been spanked by Father God! There are people stealing from me right now but I dont care b/c the Lord will deal with them! Family members have tried to ruin my reputation but character and integrity won ... it didnt happen over night but every step towards Jesus has been worth it! There is someone in my life right now who wants to kill me but I refuse to carry a gun b/c God is my Defender and He does protect the strong! When I first became a Christian many said it wouldnt last and they called me a "Holy Roller" but now they call me for prayer ... so God is good ... ALL THE TIME! I know this isnt what you wanted to hear but maybe its what you needed to hear, because I love you and sometimes we just need to be reminded of the TRUTH b/c it sets you free!
  
  Saturday at 3:53pm ·
- Me: I'm expressing what LIFE has taught me. Not God, not the Bible, not Jesus - LIFE. TODAY is a hard day. TODAY is a HARD day. It IS true that there are no defenders for the strong (in my opinion). I never said I was denying God's truth - I'm talking about LIFE!!!
  Saturday at 4:06pm ·
- Cousin: I wish you would let me show you how to find JOY on hard days!
  Saturday at 4:10pm ·
- Me: I never said I didn't have joy. I just said today is a hard day. That's all I said. TODAY is a hard day. That's all.
  Saturday at 4:35pm ·
- Friend: I love how honest you are about everything you're feeling because I have those rough days sometimes and it's good to see someone so refreshingly honest about things.
  Saturday at 4:38pm ·
- Me: THANK YOU!!
  Saturday at 4:39pm ·
- Friend: You're welcome. :)
  Saturday at 4:41pm ·
- Cousin: Ok, just trying to help!
  Saturday at 4:48pm

Character Revealed

2011-06-24T14:59:00.000-07:00

A friend posted the following quote as his Facebook status today: "It is impossible to learn anything important about anyone until we get him or her to disagree with us; it is only in contradiction that character is disclosed." Sydney J. Harris

Sydney J. Harris (14 September 1917 - 8 December 1986) was an American journalist for the Chicago Daily News, and the Chicago Sun-Times. But, this isn't about Mr. Harris. This is about disagreements and character.

It is no secret that Christians often use the Bible as an excuse to behave badly. I've written about many a "believer" who manipulates scripture for his or her own nefarious activities. It's shameful.

Pharisaical people are also great at twisting scripture to support their actions when others disagree with them. How great it must be to toss all personal responsibility onto God. You don't like the way I lead my ministry, raise my kids, honor my spouse, treat my neighbor, or do my job? Well, "God led me to do it this way". Who's going to argue with that logic?

It'd be awesome if my employer would let me palm off my responsibilities in that manner. I could not show up for work all week and say, "God spoke to me, and He told me I should take a few days off to refresh, renew, and fellowship with him." Hmmm...I wonder how that would go over with my boss? And yet, I've had Sunday School teachers use that exact excuse for not showing up on Sunday mornings with nary a phone call to cover their shift. And they get away with it!

I'm pretty sure God calls us to honor our commitments.

Most of us sit in our church pews, bow our heads during prayer, raise our hands during worship, and drop a few bucks in the offering plate. And yet, there are people - brothers and sisters - sitting on the other side of the room with whom we argue and disagree. How we handle those conflicts is a reflection of our character.

The fact that we have misunderstandings and squabbles is a part of the human condition and most often unavoidable. How we deal with discord and strife, however, is a reflection of our character. When we blame God for our junk, we are a poor reflection of God's character. The majority of Christ followers would agree that God is perfect, so how can we blame our imperfection on Him?

It's not okay to use God as a cover for what I lack in personal character and honor. Owning up to my mistakes is hard and painful, but nothing of real value is ever easy.

Now, let's get off the pew, take personal ownership of our successes AND our failures, and let's take seriously the task of developing strong characters within. Remember, it is in times of disagreement and dissension that our character is disclosed. We aren't fooling anyone. God longs to shine through us.

When Did I Stop Believing?

2011-06-21T12:39:00.000-07:00

When did this happen?

When was it, exactly, that I woke up and realized I could no longer defend "The Church"?

I was raised in a family that went to church every single weekend and at least once during the week. Mom played the piano and Dad operated the soundboard (when he wasn't napping during the sermon). My siblings and I sang, read scripture, and even served as greeters.

As I grew, I began to see and recognize The Church had its flaws. My childhood minister had an affair with the head deacon's wife and they eventually married. Come to think of it - most of my early spiritual leaders were a bit more randy then my naive pre-teen self could ever have imagined. The Church was not immune to scandal and gossip.

Even with its faults, I saw the good and gave grace to the bad. I bought into the bumper sticker mentality that said, Not Perfect, Just Forgiven. I praised the virtues of an almighty God who was powerful enough to create the entire world and everything in it, yet gentle and personal enough to love little ol' me and live in my imperfect heart.

And then - and I don't know exactly when it was - I stopped making excuses for The Church. We are messed up. We don't need to put stickers on the shiny bumper of our brand new SUVs. The whole universe knows we're not perfect. They also believe us to be Pharisaical hypocrites, judgmental bigots, critical homophobes, and crazy loons.

Do they have a case? Are we those things?

I love The Father. He has rescued my family and me from unimaginable chaos. He delivered us from the prison of a gravely dysfunctional church body.

We've been called to be salt and light. But too much salt kills the flavor and drowns the uniqueness of the very food it's supposed to enhance. So often, I think that's what we think our job is - to smother anyone who believes differently and who acts in opposition to our haughty perceived perfection.

We've got to knock that crap off!

I'll keep searching for the good, and speaking out against the bad. The Church is broken and I'm not gonna fix it all by myself. I can, however, be salt and light to a world searching and to a church hurting.

Today I choose to get off the pew!

You Can't Make This Stuff Up

2011-05-03T10:55:00.000-07:00

Today's post is from guest blogger, Liz Stoeckel. This is being reposted with the author's permission.

I love, love the film “You’ve Got Mail”. I bet I’ve seen it 20 times! At one point Kathleen Kelly writes to her chat room buddy, NY152, “So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around?” I’ve got the opposite issue. So much of the fiction I read reminds me of frightening experiences I’ve actually lived through.

People read books and think, “that doesn’t happen in real life”. I’m here to tell you—yes it does!

I’ve read every one of Nicholas Sparks’ romance laden, tear jerkin’, heart breakin’ novels. Hey, don’t judge me. He rocks. But Sparks’ latest book, “Safe Haven”, is messin’ me up! I’ve lived parts of this story!

The book is about the mysterious and beautiful Katie who appears in a small North Carolina town. Alex is a young widower with two small children. He immediately takes a liking to Miss Katie.

Katie’s past is slowly revealed, and her fictional drama is reminding me of my real-life chronicles. She ran away from her abusive husband. Not only did he hit her and attempt to control her every move, he also used Bible scripture to justify himself.

My ex-husband used the Bible to legitimize his bizarre antics. He wouldn’t go to the grocery story with me because “God hadn’t released” him. He spent hours in front of the television watching Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker because “God directed” him through their show, Praise The Lord. He stayed home and cast demons out of my closet while I was at work, then threw me up against a wall in an attempt to exorcise the devil out of me.

One evening we went to marriage counseling at the home of one of the pastors from our church. We got to the small apartment in Clovis before the pastor and his wife had a chance to get home from the Sunday night service. We sat on the patch of grass in front of the complex—my baby son asleep in my arms.

While we waited there on that muggy summer evening, Terry read scriptures to me. Better to live on the corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife, Proverbs 21:9 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord, Ephesians 5:22. Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting to the Lord, Colossians 3:18. And on and on.

That counseling session did not go as Terry expected. The pastor directed all counsel at my then-husband. He was not being a Godly leader—he wasn’t working and providing for his family, he couldn’t be called the Spiritual head of the home, and he was ignoring the Bible’s instructions to love your wives and do not be harsh to them. (Colossians 3:19)

At the end of our time together that evening, the counselor instructed me to not “use” any of the things said that evening against Terry. In other words, I was not to say, “I told you so!”

On the way home I asked if we could stop for a Sprite soda. Terry went ballistic, saying things like, “The pastor told you not to use his words to get what you want. I suppose you think you can ask me for anything now.” I remember being so terrified that night.

He eventually left Dallas and me at our apartment and he disappeared. I didn’t see him until the next day. Such ugliness.

My former husband has not been the only “Christian” to use the Bible as a weapon of mass destruction. I think I’ve accepted some of the abuse because I sincerely want to “hear” God and honor Him. People often use God as a hammer to beat people into submission.

I’ve written about the associate pastor who told me I was “on a dangerous path” because I asked “Why?” His boss had removed me from a leadership position that I loved and was good at. When I asked why, I was told, “Because I’m in charge.” Don’t ask questions…submit to the will and way of the leader—the man. These could’ve been the instructions of cult leaders like David Koresh or Jim Jones!

It’s not just men who are spiritual bullies – women do it too. Oh, our ways are subtler, but no less wrong. We gossip and call it a “prayer request”. We manipulate and claim to have “heard God” tell us truths He won’t tell you.

Sunday at church the pastor challenged us. John the Baptist said, “Repent, for the kingdom of God is at hand.” But Jesus said, “The kingdom of God is here, repent.” In other words, come have a relationship with me and hopefully that relationship leads to change. Real heart reformation rarely happens in the finger pointing, name calling, judgment-rendering call to “REPENT!” (Cue echo sound effect)

I grew up in a very legalistic and spiritually oppressive environment. I grew up believing that it was way more important to act religious than to know Jesus and actually have him as a friend. When I was young I was terrified of breaking the rules because God’s wrath would send me straight to hell.

As a young adult I went to the same kind of legalistic, fire and brimstone “do this” “don’t do that” kind of church. It was what was familiar. If I could change one thing about my past, I’d change what my kids learned about religion when they were little. I hope they one day see a clear picture of who Jesus really is—not the spiritual bully they grew up seeing in others.

Home churches are on the rise today. A friend told me the other day she chooses to forego the traditional church because everyone in the home church has “issues just like me”. It would be more honest to say that people at the home church ADMIT to having issues far more readily than the traditionalists, with their “Repent Now!” mantra.

To the bullies I say, no, I am not “too weak”! I’m the strongest person you’ll ever meet and I’ve survived things most people only read about in novels. No, God did not “tell” you some mean, oppressively religious thing about me. We talk everyday and HE thinks I’m awesome. And no, just because you’re a pastor does not mean you can manipulate and twist my words in order to prove I’m something I’m not. No!!

(You can find more from Liz Stoeckel at lizbydesign.blogspot.com)

Waitin' to be discovered!

2011-05-03T10:15:00.001-07:00

Doin' Church With An Atheist

2011-03-28T12:48:00.000-07:00

I just finished reading Jim & Casper Go To Church by Jim Henderson and Matt Casper *. It’s a fabulous book that really should be read by every church leader and Christ follower out there.

I wonder, are you brave enough to look at yourself and your church through the eyes of an unbeliever?

Long-time Christian, Jim Henderson noted that most Christians have been immersed in The Church culture for so long, that we have no idea how non-Christians perceive us and the ritual we call “doing church”. So, Jim hired an atheist named Matt Casper to travel with him to 12 diverse churches and then give his honest assessment and opinions about what he saw and heard. The book details their adventure.

Matt Casper, like most atheists I know, is kind, caring, and uber smart. He asks a question we should all be asking ourselves; “Is this what Jesus told you guys to do?”

Jim and Casper visit the big and bold (Willow Creek, Saddleback, and Lakewood), and some small and scrappy churches like, a house church in San Diego and “The Bridge” in Portland, Oregon. It doesn’t surprise me to learn that the mega-churches and their mall-like campuses are a bit of a turn-off to guys like Casper.

Casper makes some worthy observations. On music: (The Saddleback band) “The music is too contrived, too slick, too professional, really. I see the entertainment value, but when it comes to music, I like it pure. Too much polish and you lose the heartfelt power, you lose the soul of the music, and you’re not gonna move anyone.”

On visual effects: (The Dream Center in Los Angeles, CA) “Is that what Jesus told you guys to do? Put on a Christian rock show that’s visually and sonically indistinguishable from a non-Christian rock show, change the words, and call it church? Is that pulled from the Bible?”

Joel Osteen is big on the “name it and claim it” religious philosophy, and his vague style of preaching did not appeal to Casper at all. When Osteen’s wife, Victoria cried during the offering call (and a camera close-up revealed her make-up didn’t run), Casper was livid. Victoria manipulatively nudged troubled parishioners to give when she said, “God, through your faithfulness to him, will turn things around.” This implies that if bad things happen to us, it’s our fault for not giving enough to God.

Listen, Matt Casper isn’t the only one that gets ticked off about that brand of overt manipulation. It seems to me that the very public fall of money-hungry, power-thirsty preachers like Jim Bakker and Jimmy Swaggart would keep leaders from using scare tactics to get people to give their hard-earned monies.

My favorite part of the book is the question and answer section at the end in which we Christians reveal how very defensive we can be about how we do church. Both Henderson and Casper address the concerns and questions with grace and understanding.

I walked away from this read with a hunger to “do”. You see, Jesus didn’t just teach us what to believe, but how to act out our faith by serving others—feeding the poor, helping the helpless, and caring for the lost. No, our salvation is not determined by our work, but the assurance of our salvation should inspire us to act.

I encourage you to expand your circle of friends and influences to include people from many and varied faiths and beliefs. Listen—really listen to their thoughts, views, and opinions about God, the world, church, and Christianity. You will be encouraged, inspired, and motivated to get off the pew and put work boots on your faith. Break out of your comfort zone and get off the pew!

Oscar Thanks

2011-03-03T15:22:00.000-08:00

Why hadn't I noticed it before? Among the beautiful gowns, the awkward hosts, the swearing, the political grand-standing, and the tiny slips of paper tucked neatly in the palms of sweating hands, I'd missed it until now. And such a glaring omission too.

I don't think a single honoree at the recent Academy Awards ceremony said thank you to God.

I've become accustomed to hearing the rappers, country legends, and rock music relics give thanks to God as they tearfully clutch their paper-weight/award. The words "Thank you to God" are as common a sound at the Grammy and country music award shows as the orchestral play-off. Not so at the Oscar bash.

When I was a child the church taught me it was a sin to go to movies. My parents took us to drive-in theaters, however. Perhaps there'd be less chance of getting caught there. By the way, I really miss the days when one could carry a butter-soaked brown bag of popcorn from home to the movies. But I digress.

Is God truly not invited into moviedom, or is the Hollywood community just more honest about the absence of God than are music artists? I wonder, is "Thank you God" just something musicians say because it's expected, or is the Holy Spirit more welcome in Nashville, Austin, and Branson than in Beverly Hills, Burbank, and Los Angeles?

I don't know the answers to those questions, but I do know that the smallest flicker of light can permeate any darkness. If the Holy Spirit is really absent in movie star circles, it's not because He doesn't want to be there, it's because He hasn't been invited.

I know there's a vibrant community of believers in Hollywood. They get hushed a lot. I'm sure they'd appreciate our prayers for them as they are real Daniels in what can be a real lion's den.

Look around. Much of the world's population moves through their routines everyday with nary a whispering of God's name. The "mission field" is not on another continent in another hemisphere. The mission field is right under your nose--in your own home, workplace, grocery store, and church pew.

Where there is light there cannot be darkness. God is alive and well--even in Hollywood. Now get off the pew and invite the light into the darkness. Keep today's "Daniels" in your prayers--the ones in faraway places, and the ones next door and around the corner.

Where Atheists Get It Right

2011-02-24T09:15:00.000-08:00

One of my atheist friends made an observation: “You Christians have it easy in some ways. Since your god forgives you for everything, you get to go around being mean without ever making it right because you’ve been ‘forgiven’.”

Wow!

My friend pointed out that atheists are not conscience free. Instead of praying to God to forgive them and (hopefully) silence that still small voice nagging at them from the back of their head, they actually go to the person they offended and make things right.

There are people we’ve wronged with whom we will never be reconciled. Loved ones who are gone or mentally impaired, for instance. In cases involving missed opportunities, we are so blessed to know that forgiveness can still be ours because of God’s amazing grace.

When we lie, cheat, gossip, or in some other way mistreat people, we can’t just fall back on the bumper sticker-ism, “Not Perfect, Just Forgiven”. We must be reconciled!

God’s forgiveness is ours for the asking, about that there is no argument. The New Testament is filled with admonishments to believers regarding our interpersonal relationships, and yet we still treat our brothers and sisters shamefully. Of course God forgives us for our many infractions, but we need to make things right with each other.

Come on! Get off the pew and be reconciled with the people you worship with every Sunday.

Jammin' for Jesus

2011-02-22T18:48:00.000-08:00

Question--Do these signs really work to draw people into church? What do you think?

Just askin'.

Linger Here and Begin to Pray in the Sprit

2011-02-22T15:36:00.001-08:00

I know God calls people to pray. Sometimes we may not know exactly why we're praying, or what it is we're supposed to pray for. But God knows. Our job is to be faithful. Here's a story of how God was working in Tucson seven days before tragedy struck.

I found this article written by Ralaine Fagone on the website, Breaking Christian News.

Be encouraged to get off the pew and pray.

The Deacon - God said, "Linger Here and Begin to Pray in the Spirit"

As he turned off the bike he heard the Holy Spirit call him to prayer: "Linger here and begin to pray in the Spirit."

Our nation has been in awe over the speedy recovery of Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, who was shot in the head on Saturday, January 8, 2011, in Tucson, Arizona. During a community event outside a shopping market on the corners of Ina and Oracle a man opened fire into a crowd of people. The first reports were sketchy; one news agency presumed her dead, with six others, while many painted a gloomy end to her critical condition. The doctors began to give hopeful reports and downgraded her condition quickly. Within two-and-a-half weeks she was transferred from one care facility to a place where she could begin rehabilitation from her brain injuries.

The nation's prayers after the shooting of Congresswoman Giffords have proven to be effective. But, what about prayers that took place before the event? I know one man who was called to stand and pray one week before the shooting took place.

Dick Tesi, affectionately called Deacon Dickie from Restoration International, was riding his motorcycle through Tucson on Saturday, January 1, 2011. He pulled into a gas station at the intersection of Ina and Oracle, next to a Safeway store. He felt prompted to turnoff his motorcycle before entering his next destination into the GPS. As he turned off the bike he heard the Holy Spirit call him to prayer: "Linger here and begin to pray in the Spirit." Always willing to co-operate with the Father, Dickie stood and prayed while his eyes scanned the area. He was unsure why he needed to pray right then and there. Still, he remained until he felt released. Back on the road; his work was completed.

When the news reports aired, telling the horror that took place, Deacon Dickie stopped to remember his call to prayer the week prior. He realized the prayer was strategic for the tragic event. Dickie expressed his concern regarding his "ineffective" prayer in light of the six lives lost that day. My premature response said, "It could have been worse, we don't know."

As the reports of Congresswoman Giffords' remarkable progress begun to flow to the nation, I gained insight connecting these two events. Over seven years ago Deacon Dickie experienced a miraculous recovery from a brain injury due to a motorcycle accident. Dickie was on full life support, bringing him to the threshold of eternity. Then the healing power of Jesus intervened. His brain was so swollen, part of it had to be removed. The miracle continued by making him whole and restoring his memory. I believe this made him the perfect candidate to stand and pray with authority over the events to come. Dickie had faced a similar frontal lobe injury as the Congresswoman, and had victory, making him a conqueror. Dickie had the right resume'; God called the right man to stand in the parking lot and pray over the brain injury to come.

Follow those promptings and calls to prayer. Pray from the spirit and partner with Father's plans. You may not have understanding or think the prayer is ineffective. But, a time may come, like it did for my friend Deacon Dickie, where you will look back and be struck with the awe and mystery of God.

No one's ever seen or heard anything like this, never so much as imagined anything quite like it—What God has arranged for those who love Him. But you've seen and heard it because God by His Spirit has brought it all out into the open before you.

The Spirit, not content to flit around on the surface, dives into the depths of God, and brings out what God planned all along. Who ever knows what you're thinking and planning except you yourself? The same with God—except that He not only knows what He's thinking, but He lets us in on it. 1 Corinthians 2:10-13 (The Message)

Perhaps you noticed the unusual aspects of this story. Things like it had been seven years since Dickie's accident where he [was on the brink of death], and he prayed seven days before the accident—demonstrating God's completion. Even the names of key players are relevant; the street corners of Oracle—means "speaker" or "word" and Ina—is translated "pure", the store named Safe-way, and Gabrielle—means "Hero of God." There is a story within the story. This adds to the mysteries of God.

Written by Ralaine Fagone and reported by Breaking Christian News.

What Jesus Would NOT Do

2011-02-18T11:41:00.000-08:00

Great food for thought.

Ask Forgiveness - Not Permission

2011-02-03T11:27:00.000-08:00

It’s easier to ask forgiveness than permission.

A lot of people live this way, and I’m a little bit jealous of them. They are brave, confident, and unflinching. But what about those people from whom forgiveness must be asked? Perhaps they’d RATHER be considered before an act is committed against them.

A local church just finished a remodel on the campus. They chose to move forward and finish the project without securing the proper building permits, so as to have the building ready in time to host a special invited guest. They’re now on the hook for fines levied by the city.

Look, all the people who give their tithes and offerings to this church have trusted the pastor, the staff, and the church board to be good stewards of their hard-earned money.

The remodel alone cost hundreds of thousands of dollars. In these precarious economic times, it’s irresponsible to throw money away on unnecessary fines. Oh sure, the pastor can ask for forgiveness, but is the cost of breaking the law and damaging the church’s reputation really worth the prestige of hosting a big name musical group?

I strongly believe that Christian leaders ought to be setting the bar for propriety and goodness. We are only human, of course, and therefore flawed. However, we are called to be Jesus with skin on. He came to offer forgiveness, not ask for it.

Now get of the pew and do right. If you’ve been given a position of church leadership, you’ve been called to a big job and you need to be in pursuit of holiness while fulfilling your responsibilities.

Remember, Jesus came to offer forgiveness – not ask for it! Now get off the pew, kick clichés and platitudes out the door, and take care of that which has been entrusted to you.

Feelin' Good

2011-01-27T10:01:00.000-08:00

What could possibly be any better than a "thumbs up" from Jesus?

It's gonna be a good day.

When a Church Doesn't Want You

2011-01-27T09:38:00.000-08:00

Finding a new church home is never easy – especially when you’re new to the area.

Sherry was a single mom with two young kids when she moved to California from the Mid-west. One of the first things she set out to do was find a good church home, so she began her search.

The young mom was quick to filter out the churches that wouldn’t fit with her needs. The kids were her top priority, so she wanted a place where she knew they’d be safe and blessed. She was looking for a church that wasn’t so small that she’d feel smothered, and yet not so large that she’d get lost in the crowd.

Week after week she visited the myriad of faith families in the city she now called home, and it didn’t take long for her to find the church to which she wanted to commit. Her kids loved their new Sunday school teachers and were quickly making friends and connections.

Sherry enrolled in the membership classes, which only served to reinforce the fact that she was indeed in the right place.

When the education was over, Sherry happily joined with the other graduates and prepared to become an official member of her new church. She and the kids had been regular attendees for six or more months and they were settling into their new life in California.

The final step in becoming a church member was meeting personally with the pastor, presumably so he could welcome the parishioners to the family. That’s when it all fell apart.

The pastor of the church Sherry now considered her home sat across the desk from her in his large office. “Sherry”, he said, “you are a single mom with two kids and I don’t think you fit our member profile. Thank you for your interest, but we won’t be making you a member.”

Why? Sherry may never know for sure, since she walked out of that man’s office and never returned to the church. Was it because divorce made her and her family somehow unseemly? Was it because she couldn’t contribute financially as substantially as some of the other parishioners?

It is only by the grace of God that Sherry still believes in assembling together with other believers and attends any church at all. Her kids are now teens, and like many of us, she’s seen her share of piety and hypocrisy in the church. My friend Sherry keeps her eyes on the Lord.

Look around. Are there new people sitting in the pew next to you? Welcome them, talk to them and listen to them—listen well. Get off the pew!

New Direction?

2011-01-26T14:56:00.000-08:00

How awesome it must be to blame God for not doing the job you’re being paid to do!

One of the part-time staffers at the church was called in last week for a chat with her supervisor. It seems that she’s been dropping the ball a lot lately. Her excuse? “God has been calling me to go in another direction.”

I worked at a church once as the Director of Drama Ministries. It was a ministry I was passionate about, and even though I served as an unpaid worker, I was faithful and put in a lot of time each week. I logged hundreds of volunteer hours especially around Christmas and Easter.

There were several people on our little drama team—each one with his or her unique strengths and talents. I loved those people.

One of the members of our troupe started dropping the ball. She’d promise to write, then wouldn't complete a draft, or she’d commit to rehearsing a Sunday morning skit then never get around to it. Her excuse? “It must not have been God’s plan since I never got it done.”

That has seriously got to be one of my biggest pet peeves among believers—we blame God for our laziness. Worse—we get away with it! I mean, who’s going to call us on the carpet and challenge our procrastinating ways, especially when it means we’re questioning God?

The church employee who met with her boss last week was able to quit her job AND get a good recommendation. She even got a pat on the back for listening to God’s voice in leading her life! Out in the real world, she’d get fired for not doing her job, and her permanent file would be filled with notes like, “hears voices”, and “thinks God talks to her”. Future employers would be hard-pressed to hire the crazy girl.

Look, of course I believe that God leads us in many and varied ways. I also believe He calls us to be people of the highest character, and He doesn’t want to be used as an excuse for our slothfulness.

Yep, it must be nice to be able to blame one’s bad behavior on “God’s leading”. I believe that when we do that, more often than not, we are slandering the divine and perfect character of the Lord.

Don’t be lazy and self-serving. Get off the pew!

When Preachers are Steamrollers

2011-01-25T16:42:00.001-08:00

A young preacher was hired to lead one of the large churches on the Northwest side of our city. One of his favorite mantras over the past year-and-a-half has been, “I’d rather do something and make a mistake, then do nothing.”

So, Pastor W. has done a whole lot of somethings and has made a whole lot of mistakes. Sadly, many of his missteps have left wounded and broken people in their wake. Is that fair?

My question today is, at what point should a church board or council step in and decide enough is enough?

Pastor W. fired several long-time church employees and replaced them with younger, hipper staffers. He was new to our area when he was installed and he knew no one. He hired several people who swooped in and impressed the new guy, but who had little work experience. Some of those laborers didn’t work out so well. So, faithful long-time employees are out of work, and the church is still short-staffed because the younger, hipper new-hirers got in way over their heads.

Two decades ago the church family raised the funds to build a gym that could accommodate the needs of the growing kids and teens. It was an especially important project for the then-pastor because he recognized that without kids the church dies. It was a magnificent building—basketball court, moveable stage, tons of room—an all-purpose family life center.

The preacher who oversaw the building of that center passed away a few years ago. I wonder what he would say now that the gathering place for kids and families has been remodeled into a second Sanctuary, and is no longer basketball or kid friendly.

Under Pastor W’s leadership, Sunday school classes have been cancelled, events are no more, ministries were told to roll up their banners and call it quits, and Bible study groups have been disbanded. Services have been added and subtracted, and the “direction of the church” has changed four or five times in less than 2 years.

Not everyone is as ADD as the young new pastor, and parishioners can be slow to change. You know, Christians love their church. They love the choir, their Sunday school teacher, the nursery “cuddlers” who invest in their kids and grandkids, and the friendly face that greets them with a warm handshake every Sunday morning.

Change is good. Change is necessary. Without change there is no growth. But is there such a thing as moving too fast? What happens to the church body when you steamroll over it? People have hearts and relationships and feelings. Christians are like everybody else—we need to find a place where we belong.

Is steamrolling over folks and their ideas really the best way for Pastor W. to grow the church? People are leaving in droves, while others are sitting and stewing in their pew of anger and disappointment. The church board is “trusting God”.

I firmly believe that change is a GREAT thing and is imperative for new growth. I don’t know what the answer is, but I think that pride gets in the way when good men put more value in their ideas then they do on the feelings and needs of the people who hired them. We get mad at politicians who do that and we fire them! But when a pastor does the same thing, we often get angry, hurt, or bitter, and leave the body. Some of us have spoken up, but we’ve been chastised by pew-sitters for doing so.

I don’t know the answer, but we’ve got to do better. Get off the pew and do better!

She's a...Prophet?

2011-01-24T20:20:00.000-08:00

My friend “Libby” and I have known one another since we were kids. Our parents were friends, we attended the same Seventh-Day-Adventist church and the same Adventist school. Neither one of us are Adventists today.

For those of you who might be unfamiliar with the Adventist faith, let me give you an overview. Adventists are sabbatarians, that is, they (like the Jews) believe that Saturday is the Sabbath of the Bible and are legalistic about keeping it. Sabbath begins each week on Friday night at sundown, and ends when the sun sets on Saturday.

The Seventh-Day-Adventist church has its roots in a religious movement that began in 1833 when a Baptist layman named William Miller prophesied Jesus’ return (which he believed would happened in or about 1843). Among the “Millerites” was a woman named Ellen G. White. It wasn’t long before her visions and prophecies had more believers and followers than Mr. Miller’s, and a group broke away and formed a new church. The S.D.A. church was formally established in 1863.

Okay, back to my friend Libby. We were chatting the other day about some of our high school memories—teachers, friends, etc… We both remember being in a Bible class where we rarely opened the Bible. Rather, we studied the extensive catalog of books and writings by Ellen G. White—the church’s prophet.

In 1982 a man named William Rea published a book titled, “The White Lie”, in which he outed Mrs. White as a fraud. When she was a teen, Libby read Mr. Rea’s book. She recollects sitting in Bible class and having many questions about Ellen White and her writings. She wanted (and needed) answers, so she raised her hand and made her queries. The teacher called my outspoken friend out of class.

“Libby”, said Mr. M., “your questions are confusing the other kids in the class and you need to keep your mouth shut.” Mr. M. didn’t stop there. “Also, I am dumbfounded as to how exactly to deal with you as you are neither male or female.”

Why would a teacher say such a thing to a high school girl?

My friend was embarrassed, ashamed, and confused. From that moment on she didn’t speak out in class, and she kept her questions to herself. Rather than deal with the questions and allow personal opinions and debate, that teacher dismissed my friend.

Hey, I know how the situation could easily have been resolved. It was “Bible” class, right? Here’s an idea…TEACH THE BIBLE! It’s no wonder the Adventist church is seen by many as a cult. The writings of the “prophet” contradict the Bible in plenty of ways, and yet more emphasis has often been put on Mrs. White’s word, than the Word of God.

I wonder if Mr. M. is still a Seventh-Day-Adventist today. I wonder how many other students he shut up because he wasn’t able to explain away the holes Libby saw in the Adventist theology.

To all you who teach, lead, or in some way influence young people, let me encourage you. Please, please let kids ask questions. Encourage them to think outside the box and look for answers. If you don’t know the answers to their questions, don’t shut them up. Rather, help them find the solutions to their puzzles. You could even learn a thing or two along the way. You might have to get off the pew to discover and discern, but you’ll be glad you did. Get off the pew.

Clean For Jesus

2011-01-22T10:08:00.001-08:00

Thank goodness! You never know when you're gonna need a bit of divine intervention, and now I can carry it in my pocket.

Note the small print on the top part of the label on this hand sanitizer - "Save Yourself" "Save Others". Woo Hoo!

Be Careful What You Pray For!

2011-01-20T11:39:00.000-08:00

"Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain." I Chronicles 4:10

Many Christians know this scripture as The Prayer of Jabez. Bruce Wilkinson wrote a little inspirational book published in 2000 titled, “The Prayer of Jabez: Breaking Through to the Blessed Life”. I read the book, as did most of my friends, and the pastor preached a series of sermons based on the principles inspired by the scripture and bestseller.

Oh, that You would bless me indeed… Not a little, but INDEED. The adverb is used here as an intensifier. In praying this, I’d be asking the Lord to not just show me a tad bit of kindness, but also bless me big. In this context Jabez was petitioning God for favor and mercy. Mercy. Indeed.

Enlarge my territory… It was, apparently, the desire of Jabez’s heart to share his faith with as many people as possible. Most of us hate the idea of getting out of comfort zone, but not this man, Jabez. Whatever God had to do to widen his sphere of influence, he was open to it. I felt the same way.

…that Your hand would be with me… That was far and away the easiest part of the prayer to REALLY mean from the heart. I wanted the Lord to cover me, keep my family and me safe, and walk with us every minute of the day.

…that You would keep me from evil… Temptation is everywhere. I pray everyday that God will keep me from myself. You know what I’m talking about—we are always at war with the desires of our sinful human nature.

…that I may not cause pain. I’ve not always been successful, but it has always been my prayer and desire that I not cause pain for anyone else. I know that I can be thoughtless and selfish, so this little prayer reminded me that with I could do all things through Christ and with His strength—even be a nicer person.

I was inspired to pray the short prayer with my family every day. So, each morning before breakfast, we recited the words together.

It didn’t take long for our morning ritual to become second nature. We blessed our breakfast, and then every adult and child at the table narrated the scripture in unison.

Be careful what you pray for.

I really did want God to bless us big, to keep me from sinning, and to keep us safe. I did indeed want God to expand my territory, and I thought I knew how He might do that. He ended up giving me a bigger platform than I ever expected, and He did it His way.

Our meth-addicted daughter ran away from home and my territory expanded to addicts and liars. She went to rehab and we became friends with counselors, parents of prodigals, and people from all over the country. Our drug-addicted son went to prison and our territory expanded to include parole officers and other broken-hearted parents.

As if living with the disappointment and brokenness caused by the choices of our kids wasn’t enough, the pastor of the church we attended asked us to leave because our son was “too hard”. The pain was crushing, but our sphere of influence once again expanded to other people in other churches.

In an earlier post I lamented the church’s lack of compassion and action in regards to parents of prodigals. Nothing excuses bad behavior and acts of judgment and condemnation. I want to remind myself, however, that if not for the ugliness I might still be sitting on that comfortable pew—not speaking, not sharing, not growing more passionate about God.

So, I will continue to pray, “Lord, expand my territory in any way you choose to do so. Make me uncomfortable so that I’ll get off the pew!”

Does Attitude Really Trump Talent?

2011-01-17T17:25:00.000-08:00

“Attitude always trumps talent.” A guest pastor stood before the congregation last week and preached what I’ve come to call a stock sermon. I think it might have been #23 from the top 100.

The pastor told story after story about talented people who’ve moved in and out of his ministry, but who were in desperate need of an attitude adjustment. If you’ve been around churches for any time at all, you know the stories—the guitarist who plays on the worship team in the morning and the bar at night, the actor who had that questionable bit part in the low-budget film, or the singer who dared to audition for American Idol.

I’ve watched so many talented volunteers and part-time staffers fired from ministries because they just didn’t have the “right heart”. They’ve been accused of being “worldly minded”. I myself was fired from my job as the Director of Drama Ministries at a church because I performed at a small dinner theatre.

Why is it that the pastor who judges the heart of the artist is never taken to task for his or her critical and judgmental spirit?

I’ve watched several churches walk through the pastoral search process. In most cases, it can take a year or more to find the pastor who meets all the requirements of a church congregation or exploration team. Nowhere on the list, I’m guessing, are the words, “attitude trumps talent”.

Parishioners want their pastor/teacher to be highly educated, experienced, AND talented. Imagine a search committee coming to a church board meeting and saying, “We found the guy. He’s not very talented or educated, but man, has he got an awesome attitude!” It wouldn’t happen!

My personal experience tells me that when a pastor says, “attitude always trumps talent” what he often means is, “that guy was talented, but I just don’t like him”.

Pastors can be a bit arrogant and insistent about doing things their way. Artists can also be audacious and proud. Both groups are faced with the reality of having to put their work and heart on display to be scrutinized and analyzed by a sometimes-critical audience.

When a pastor is confident he says, “I’m following God’s leading”. When an artist challenges a minister he or she is called, “insubordinate”. Perhaps God wants to use the singer, actor, or musician to lead alongside the pastor in a fresh new way.

A servant is one who has an attitude that puts others first, AND the talent to do the job well. The 5-star restaurant wouldn’t hire a chef who loved to cook, but never went to culinary academy. A public school couldn’t hire a teacher who loved kids, but didn’t go to college.

Listen, talent matters, education is important, and attitude has value. Jesus chose 12 men with a bit of talent and a lot of good attitude. He then lived with the men for 24 hours a day, 365 days a year for three years in order to insure the men had the very best education. Only then did He release any of them into their own ministry.

Jesus created the best volunteer/employee model for us: bring equal parts talent and attitude and give it a good education.

If you’ve got a heart for service and you feel God is leading, get of the pew and get educated. If you’re a pastor looking for a really great volunteer, look for someone who’s already doing the job you need done. Chances are they’d love to share their time and talent—they just need to be asked.

If you lead a church and you’re dealing with someone with a bad attitude—pray for and with the person. You’d be surprised how quickly attitudes improve when the person feels respected, loved, and appreciated. Now get off the pew!

I Count It All S@*&

2011-01-04T13:55:00.000-08:00

But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them S@*& that I may know Christ. Philippians 3:8.(NIV)

What? Your Bible doesn’t say that? Well, let’s look at that verse more closely.

Christians are really good at bragging about their spiritual pedigree. I’ve been to retreats and conferences where the mere introduction of a speaker leaves me feeling vastly inferior. They go something like this: “Bob Smith comes from a long line of spiritual giants. His great, great, great grandfather was the first pastor of the first church in the first incorporated city in the first county in the state of Kansas. His granddaddy built the first Christian college west of the Mississippi and his mother led an active Christian Mommy and Me playgroup which grew to be the largest Christian women’s organization in My Town, U.S.A.”

The speaker is then brought to the podium, met with thunderous applause and a healthy smattering of standing ovations. We’re not worthy, O Great One. Teach us your ways.

A woman from the mega church we used to attend started a class called “Leaving a Spiritual Legacy”. She taught parents to raise kids with the right spiritual pedigree. She pointed out that each time her children left the home she reminded them, “You carry the family name, and it’s your job to let people know what we are. Let it always be said that the Anderson kids are children of the Lord Most High.”

It reminds me of the Westminster Dog Show, or the Kentucky Derby. The prized pooches and ponies come to the games with impressive pedigrees. They often hail from a long line of winners, and they are the frontrunners from the starting gate.

Paul the apostle came to the pulpit with all the right papers—a well-respected pedigree. He lays his credentials out in Philippians 3:4-6. He came from a Jewish family who did it all right and took the idea of leaving a legacy very seriously. Paul was circumcised on the 8^th day after his birth. He belonged to the people of Israel, and even more importantly, he belonged to the prestigious Tribe of Benjamin. He was a zealous legalist who followed all the laws without error. He was “righteous” and “faultless”.

But wait, in verse 8 Paul tells the Philippians that he considers all that stuff—all that spiritual pedigree nonsense—“rubbish that I may gain Christ and be found in Him”. Righteousness, says Paul, doesn’t come from doing all the right things, but rather from knowing Christ.

The Greek word used in the passage for “rubbish” is skubalon. In the KJV this word is translated, “dung”. It’s the only time the word is used in the Bible, and I’m sure it shocked Paul’s audience to hear it spoken by him. Literally translated today, the word would be “shit”. Paul was telling the Philippians that his spiritual pedigree was nothing but shit that should be buried along with the rest of the camel dung. The only thing that matters is knowing—really knowing—Jesus Christ.

Look, I’m not saying that being proud of the multiple generations of preachers in one’s family is a bad thing, and I’m certainly not saying that raising up a child with a sense of Christian heritage and legacy is anything other than noble. What I am saying is that your pedigree won’t save you and Jesus doesn’t really care about it.

I’ve known many 3^rd and 4^th generation believers who know very little about the character of God. They’ve not seen His unconditional love in the wake of selfishness and lawlessness. They’ve not experienced the free and complete forgiveness that comes from the very heart of God—forgiveness that will NEVER come from the world (or The Church). These people brag about their Christian heritage and their prestigious lineage, but they don’t know Jesus.

I know recovering alcoholics and addicts who’ve come from long lines of sin and debauchery. Many of them only know their daddies and granddaddies from the ugly stories told to them by the pregnant women the men left behind. Some of these people have never known their moms outside of prison walls. They don’t have the Christian family Coat of Arms to hang above the fireplace mantle. But they’ve got something more valuable—they KNOW Jesus.

I don’t care what you know. I want to know how you learned it and whom you met along the way.

To all of you out there who are on search committees looking for your next inspirational speaker for your retreat or conference, I challenge you. Go out of your way and get off the beaten path. Look not for someone with all the “right” papers and credentials, but rather look for someone who has come to know—really know Jesus Christ. Let them tell their story. Let them tell you how doing all the right things is but shit when compared to feeling the warmth of God’s unconditional forgiveness wrapped around you.

Now get off the pew and look at God’s kids through the eyes of Jesus. Come on, you can do it. Just get off the pew!

Unbearable Loss

2010-12-14T01:00:00.000-08:00

How can “the church” better serve families in crisis? Well, the first thing we have to do is actually care about families in crisis.

Sadly, I know many moms and dads who’ve suffered the unbearable loss of a child. My heart aches at the thought of their empty arms and broken hearts.

The Church is usually very kind to the families who’ve survived horrific loss. I’m ashamed to admit that I’m a tiny bit jealous of the support given to them. Before you stone me, let me explain.

We went through a dark and tumultuous period when all three of our children rebelled in dramatic fashion. Our oldest son and our only daughter became addicted to the insidious drug, Meth. We found ourselves in the middle of a nightmare from which there was no waking relief. Eventually, our son went to prison and our daughter went to rehab for 7 ½ months.

We’d attended the same church for many, many years and all three kids were dedicated to the Lord by the pastor we loved. But when the going got tough, the church told us to go. The church washed their hands of us and we were asked to take our troubled kids and leave.

We walked through the fire of the next few years alone. I can tell you stories of amazing miracles, and we are so blessed to have had front row seats to God’s love, comfort, and handiwork. The aloneness, however, broke our hearts in ways we could never have imagined.

Because of our experience, I have reached out and walked with many a parent of prodigals through their painful journey. Every one of these families have their own horror story of how the body of Christ disappointed, disappeared, disapproved, or disowned these precious children of God.

The family of a sick or dying child has overwhelming needs—financial, physical, and spiritual. I think it’s admirable and wonderful when God’s kids rally together to help the grieving families navigate the challenging waters. I’ve seen the bank accounts of these moms and dads inexplicably grow, food appear on their doorsteps, yards and homes cleaned, and gifts delivered into their arms.

The parents of prodigals are lonely, broken, sad, and sometimes guilt-ridden. They suffer financial devastation, emotional breakdowns, and spiritual brokenness. More often than not, the body of Christ does nothing for these families except heap more guilt, judgment, criticism, ridicule, and pain on all the hurting people involved. Shame on us!

The only difference between the incarcerated and many of us, is that we were never caught. We’ve got to stop throwing stones. I know the needs are overwhelming, but we can do so many things to tell the parent of a prodigal you care. Pray with them, send their imprisoned child a birthday card, bring meals to the mom who is exhausted from searching for her missing child, or take up an offering to offset outrageous legal bills.

As I said, we’ve had front row seats to some of God’s most amazing miracles. We’ve seen the prodigal come home, and we were led 160 miles by God himself to find our lost child living among the homeless and addicted.

If you choose to walk alongside the parent of prodigals you too can have an all access pass to God’s miraculous handiwork. If you walk away or push them away you might just miss out on the experience of seeing God Himself.

Get off the pew and walk toward the hurting. Don’t walk away, but rather walk with them through the fire. You will see God’s face—I promise.

Picket Fences

2010-12-13T17:13:00.000-08:00

Once again the Westboro Baptist Church has made national headlines. As usual, they’ve shined an unflattering light on Christianity.

The fringe church from Kansas is mostly made up of family members of the founder, Fred Phelps. To put it bluntly, they are wackos! The Westboro faithful travel around the country picketing funerals of dead soldiers. They feel that the brave men and women deserved to die because in fighting to defend America, they are fighting for a country that defends homosexuality.

This past week the Kansas Crazies picketed the funeral of Elizabeth Edwards. They had two reasons to slam Mrs. Edwards. First, they believe that her choice to have two more children after the death of her beloved son, Wade was a rebellious act. She should have—in their view—accepted God’s decision to leave her with just one child. Secondly, Elizabeth Edwards defended the rights of the homosexual community.

The Westboro group has been in my community a number of times to picket funerals of our local hometown heroes. How can they afford to travel across the country spreading their hatred? Well, they stir up anger and rage and invariably someone ends up taking a swing at one of the picketers. They then file an assault and battery charge in court and they win monetary damages!

A Christian is supposed to be a Christ-follower. Can you imagine Jesus walking up to the mourning Mary and Martha and saying, “Your brother Lazarus was a sinner and he deserved to die. Now stop your whining and shape up or I’ll see to it that your life is cut short just like that of your brother’s”? Of course not!

We are on the front lines of a real battle—the fight to defend our Lord’s reputation. Of course He doesn’t need us to do that for Him, but the world needs to see Jesus with skin on. That is who we ought to be.

As I see it, there are two ways to battle the Kansas Crazies. First of all, speak up. These people are NOT Christ-followers. They are radicals who are slandering the name of Jesus. Secondly, go out and be salt and light to a world in need of love and comfort. For every act of hatred perpetrated by the Phelps family, we need to offer up dozens of acts of kindness.

Some motorcycle enthusiasts have formed a group called, The Patriot Guard Riders. Whenever the Westboro group comes to town with their picket signs, the Patriots rally their members together to also attend the funerals. They line their bikes up, peacefully stand side by side, and form a loving barrier between the grieving family and the picketers. What an amazing group of men and women! They become a living breathing picket fence—surrounding the families with love and protection from the enemy.

Now get of the pew and be Jesus with skin on. Defend the defenseless, love the unlovable, bandage the hurting, and speak the truth! Get off the pew!

No Suit Required

2010-11-28T20:59:00.000-08:00

“This pastor is changing things and we don’t like it. He wants people to stop wearing suits to church!”

A couple in their mid-40’s had only been coming to the church for a couple of months when they decided to go to one of the weekly dinners that are served on the large campus. They ended up sitting at a small table with a suit-wearing, sour-faced, ugly-talking older man and his wife. The crotchety couple didn’t waste time giving their tablemates an ear full.

They were, they boasted, founding members of the church and there are rules—ways of doing things around here. The new pastor, they said, didn’t respect the “traditions” of this old church.

The church I attend hired a new pastor/teacher eight months ago. The much beloved preacher he replaced retired after 44 years at the same pulpit. The outgoing leader was the only minister many in the congregation had ever known.

The new guy is a very young 48 years old. The man who retired was in his 70’s and he definitely came from a different era. His preaching style reflected his this-is-how-you-do-it confidence. No one could deliver a hellfire and brimstone sermon like the old-school minister.

Most of the staff pastors at the mega-church have been around for many, many years. They are used to doing things their way, and true accountability has kind of fallen by the wayside. A “good ol’ boy” mentality prevails.

So, in comes someone new and he’s ready to move the parishioners into the modern era, even if he has to drag the old-fashioned church kicking and screaming into the 21^st century. He brings change to the table and, let's be real, change is met with opposition 100% of the time.

Pastor New Guy offers weekly “get to know me” gatherings. I’ve been to several of these small group meetings where people are allowed to ask questions, raise concerns, voice their objections, and discuss the challenges that come with this type of transition.

The husband and his wife raised their hands and asked the pastor the question, “Are you really telling men they can no longer wear suits to church?”

“What?” Pastor New Guy was truly shocked. “Who told you that?”

The visitors related the strange conversation they’d had only an hour before. They told us they were sitting alone at a small table where the dinners are served when the old man and his wife asked if they could join them. As soon as the gray-haired man learned the younger couple was new to the church, he began bad mouthing the new pastor.

As I sat listening to this tale I was getting angrier by the second. Luckily, I didn’t have to open my mouth. Our lead pastor was plenty enough outraged.

“I didn’t say they couldn’t wear suits to church. I said they have the freedom to not wear suits to church.”

“If we hadn’t been Christians for our whole life, we might have been really offended by them.” The couple was being sweet about the ugly encounter.

“How do they know?” Pastor’s frustration was palpable. “How do they know you’re not a new believer? This is the way the ‘founding members’ of the church are talking to new attendees?”

No wonder the church stopped growing 10 years ago!

Listen up; Jesus doesn’t care whether or not you wear a suit to church! He doesn’t care about designer shoes, name-brand labels, or smart jewelry. Jesus just wants to love you like you’ve never been loved before.

Most of us have heard that church is a hospital for the sick and Jesus is the healer. A pastor friend of mine takes that analogy further. He says churches are like hospitals—you have to be extra careful to not contract an infection worse than the one you came in with.

Have you been infected with negativity, gossip mongering, pride, a judgmental attitude, or legalism? Get off the pew and take it to the great physician. Come to Jesus just as you are…no suit required! Get off the pew!

Happy Thanksgiving

2010-11-25T10:46:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving all! I pray my American friends have a fabulous day celebrating all we have to be thankful for here at home.

Mercy Acts

2010-11-23T13:30:00.000-08:00

I had a wonderful conversation the other day with a young atheist whom I love very much and is a member of our family.

He was raised in the church, and his coming to atheism was not without much thought and study. I feel confident that he knows scripture better than I do—better than most believers in fact.

We were talking about the Ten Commandments and the young man said, “Jesus said the greatest commandment was to ‘love the Lord your God with all your heart’ and the second was to ‘love your neighbor as yourself’. Right?” I agreed.

He said something that rocked my heart and has awakened my purpose.

“Christians are so pious about loving the lord THEIR God in THEIR way that they turn up their noses and turn their backs on everyone whose love for God doesn’t look exactly like theirs. They’re way to busy ‘loving’ God—and proving how good they are at it—to REALLY love their neighbor.”

When Jesus told the story of the Good Samaritan, the “expert in the law” asked, “who is my neighbor?” The Bible says the man wanted to “justify himself”. I guess he wanted Jesus to tell him that his neighbor was the guy he had drinks with at the local canteen, certainly not a nearly dead guy he stumbled upon on the side of the road!

Jesus goes on to say that a neighbor is the person who shows “mercy”. Mercy is Compassion + Action. In three short verses in the book of Luke, Chapter 10, Jesus tells of eleven actions the Samaritan did to help the stranger.

Verse 33 says the Samaritan saw the man. He then took pity on him. In verse 34 he went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. In verse 35 the Samaritan acted further. He took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’

A neighbor is someone who notices a need and acts on it. The act of loving our neighbor should be a byproduct of our love for God. They should not be exclusive of one another.

Understand, we are being watched. Do you sit in the pew and piously love God while simultaneously judging others for not loving God as much as you do? Or are you getting off the pew and living out your love through your service?

Mercy notices. Mercy feels. Mercy acts. Those who show mercy are God-like neighbors. Now “go and do likewise”. Get off the pew!

WE Are The Mission Field!

2010-11-22T15:03:00.000-08:00

There are few things in life about which I am ashamed. However, I am confessing now that I am ashamed of my behavior over the last several months.

I have allowed people to hush me.

My faith has been shaken—again. Not my faith in God (although that wavers occasionally), rather I have come close to losing all trust in the goodness of man.

Perhaps I have given humans too much credit. I really believe that we are called to be better people tomorrow than we are today. That was, is, and will be the foundation on which I built this blog. I sincerely want to be better Christ follower tomorrow than I am today.

I am more convicted then ever before that I do not want to be called a Christian. I am a Christ follower and proud of it. Christians can be mean.

There’s a sign at the end of the very long driveway leading away from the mega-church I used to attend. The sign reminds drivers that “You Are Now Entering The Mission Field”. I hate that sign!

The banner intimates to me that the church believes it is a cocoon, shielded from the ills of the world. We need only to share the gospel with the sinners outside of the compound. This is a sad fallacy. For we have all sinned and come way short of God’s glory. When we focus solely on the mission field “out there”, we neglect the hurting and the hungry sitting in the pew next to us. The mission field is you. The mission field is me.

I’m sorry for my absence over the last few months. I need to keep holding myself accountable to God. I have officially shut down the pity party and I’m gettin’ off the pew!

A Crisis

2010-08-20T16:00:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted in over a week.

I'm struggling as I walk in darkness. I guess I'm having a bit of a faith crisis.

I hope you will stay with me and I write about my struggles. Thank you!

It's Prophesied

2010-08-11T00:01:00.000-07:00

There are so many things wrong with this song.

Okay...even if you agree with the Biblical philosophy as spelled out in the oh-so-clever lyrics of this tune, the song is just an awful song. It's repetitive, boring, and the percussion patch is juvenile. Who told this poor guy he can sing? I feel so bad for the keyboard. What did it ever do to deserve this?

"...when Babylon the whore gets fried"? Wow.

Of course, this guy should know what he's talking about. He is, after all, the "Third Eagle of the Apocalypse". Really? William Tapley has produced a plethora of video instruction for us and has made it available on YouTube. He believes, among other things, that those who use condoms will not be raptured.

It's no wonder Christians get such a bad rap. This guy makes us look foolish, and he's not a true reflection of who Jesus is.

This is the deal, if we want to reach people with the amazing story of grace and perfect love, we've got to do better than this!

Excuse me, you've got a little God on you

2010-08-10T19:23:00.001-07:00

The other day we were out having dinner. We were sharing lovely conversation, a basket of fries, and a great view. I ordered the Mahi Mahi sandwich and it was amazing.

I noticed a family sitting a few tables ahead of me. If I were to guess, I would say it was Mom, Dad, four adult (or nearly adult) children, and the oldest daughter’s boyfriend. They seemed to be enjoying the food and the view as much as we were.

About midway through our meal I suddenly realized someone was standing next to me on my left. “Excuse me”, the sweet voice was gentle and quiet. “Yes?” I looked up and realized it was the oldest daughter from the family table across the room.

“You have such a joy about you”, she said. Her smile was genuine and kind. “I don’t know about you”, she continued, “but I’m a Christian.”“I’m a Christian too.” I hope I didn’t sound defensive.

“Oh. Well, that’s wonderful. And isn’t it great that it shows in your countenance.”

We exchanged a few more pleasantries—“where are you from?’, "I've been there", etc…and she went back to her family.

I almost wish I hadn’t said I was a Christian. I wonder where the conversation would have gone from there.

I wished I’d said something like, “Oh, well my joy doesn’t come from God. No, it probably comes from my daily worship of and conversation with pachyderms.”

“Uh, oh. I mean…well…enjoy your meal.”

You have to admire the young girl’s chutzpa. She clearly felt that the Lord wanted her to speak to me. I actually took it as encouragement. I was having a good time, but there were some things hanging over my head and those troubles were causing me some worry. It’s nice to know that she saw joy overriding any angst I might have been feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I shared this story with a friend of mine and she said she wishes she had the courage to walk up to people and tell them they illuminate God’s radiant joy. My friend said she used to be afraid the receiver of her blessing might not think God had anything to do with it and she’d be embarrassed. Then, my friend says, God gave her an answer for those people, “Well, God is pursuing you because He’s all over you.”

Hmmmm…. I wonder how that would be received. I honestly don’t know. As a believer, I can’t readily put myself in an unbeliever’s hypothetical shoes. But, it sounds good.

What about you? Have you made a “cold” evangelical call to a stranger sitting at a table or barstool across the restaurant from you? Would you do it? What if you felt the overwhelming God-tug on the sleeve and you knew you needed to say something?

Well, God just might call you to get off the pew…uh…I mean, out of the booth, and go talk to the little old lady, or handholding couple across the aisle next time you’re at McDonald’s. What will you say?

Coming Soon!

2010-08-02T00:17:00.000-07:00

While on vacation, I saw this sign...

And literally right next store-this sign...

Coming Soon!

What is your Holy Discontent?

2010-07-30T22:16:00.000-07:00

You can bet that if it breaks your heart, it breaks the heart of God.

What is your holy discontent? What injustice do you see that needs to be righted? What makes you cry or boils your blood?

Look around your community, your workplace, your school, your neighborhood, or your church. What do you see that’s broken? Perhaps you see hungry kids whose parents are out of work, or older citizens who need a ride to the theatre or the mall. There are neighborhoods and districts in disrepair. Maybe your own children attend an elementary school in need of volunteers who will read to the kids or tutor a struggling student.

Now look around your church. It is there that you will find my holy discontent. I am so frustrated, sad, and angry about our bad behavior.

We Christians are really good at closing our eyes to the problems that are right in our back yard. Does your heart break when you see another family torn apart by divorce? Are you sick of gossip and spiritual compromise? I promise you—if it disappoints or saddens you, it does the same to the heart of God.

We can’t sit on the sidelines and watch other people do the work or play the game. We’ve got to speak up and reach out. It’s our turn to get in the game—to get off the pew!

So what is your holy discontent? You can’t just hope that someone else will say something. You need to teach that class, lay the foundation for that community program, or seek the funding to get that outreach off the ground.

I’ve got to speak up. You’ve got to speak out. We’ve got to stand for truth and honesty and charity and human kindness. The church is hungry and the world is starving.

What is your holy discontent? What is God calling YOU to do?

Jesus wants to save us from Religion

2010-07-27T23:32:00.000-07:00

How could being a Pharisee possibly be a bad thing? I mean, in Bible times the Pharisees were the pinnacles of spiritual goodness, weren’t they?

Our pastor taught a powerful message on Sunday and his thoughts about Pharisees have stuck with me.

The Pharisees want us to repent of our sins, but they refuse to repent of their religion. Jesus wants us to repent of our religion. He, after all, came to set us free from the chains of religious “have to’s” and give us hearts of joyful “want to’s”.

The Pharisees were once the spiritual giants everyone ascribed to be. The word “Pharisee” means “pure” or “separated”. These men had a hunger for God, a passion for God’s glory, a zealot desire to convert others, a commitment to spiritual disciplines, and were obsessed with all things holy. That sounds like a pretty good list of character traits.

The problem came when these learned and religious men decided to make rules that helped people be more God-like. They judged harshly all those who didn't play by the rules.

The law said, “keep the Sabbath”. The fourth commandment says we should not work on the Sabbath and neither should those in our employee. When the disciples picked grain on the Sabbath, the Pharisees accused Jesus of breaking the law. They were so consumed with the details of the law as they saw it, that they missed the principle of the Sabbath.

I love the word picture the pastor painted for us during his sermon on Sunday. He pointed to a chair. If the law had dictated we were not to sit in the chair, then the Pharisees would have demanded we not stand next to the chair for fear that we might be tempted to sit. They might go even further, and declare it unlawful to be in the same room as the chair or even talk about the chair. These Pharisee-mandated laws were meant to protect the weak people from their sinful nature, and to help the general population discern good from bad.

The Pharisees of today are no different. They go to the extreme in hopes of never giving the slightest appearance of evil deed or thought. They expect the same from us. If our life doesn’t look like they think it should look, they judge our purity.

Pharisees start out (I believe) with the best of intentions, but religiosity takes over. They hit us over the head with hard and fast rules. The Holy Spirit wants to gently guide us.

The Bible says to refrain from being drunk with wine. Today’s Pharisee would insist that we should never have a glass of wine with dinner, a cold beer with the guys, or a Cosmo with the girls. I have one friend who will not sit in the bar section of any restaurant for fear that someone will see him and get the wrong idea.

The Bible talks about being filled with the Holy Spirit and refers to a “prayer language”. The Pharisee believes that unless you speak in tongues, then the Holy Spirit doesn't live in you. You have also not received your intended gift from the spirit.

There are good and Godly people who believe with all their heart that it is a sin to use one’s talent for anything secular. Artists should stay away from Hollywood, New York, Chicago, local theatre, or nightclubs. I know a woman who played the piano for her church choir. She was called to fill in for the regular piano player in a friend’s band. The New Year’s Eve gig paid well, so she said yes. The Music Pastor found out she played with the non-Christian band, and he fired her. Pharisee!

The examples go on and on. Pharisees judge people who celebrate Halloween, go to dances, watch R-rated movies, smoke cigarettes, and swear.

If Jesus were walking among us today, he'd get off the pew and go to the darkest streets of Amsterdam, New Orleans, and Oakland. He wouldn't care who saw him or what they thought.

Jesus wants us to repent of our religion.

Now get off the pew!

Volunteer Burnout

2010-07-23T12:19:00.000-07:00

Last week I spent some time with an old friend. It’s always great to catch up and reconnect.

My friend’s family has made a choice about how to serve and meet needs in their local church families. Yes, I do mean “families”, as they have attended several churches in their hometown.

My friends swoop into a church, get to know the people, identify a need that they are able to meet, fill the insufficiency, and then they walk away. They might not walk away from the church altogether, but they walk away from being put in a position to be taken advantage of.

Once they took their young grandson to the nursery at a church and saw that the room was in disrepair. Since this couple is particularly handy, they repaired walls, built shelves, put down new carpet, and bought new toys.

My friends have helped refugees, widows, and kids by painting a worn torn house, furnishing a room, or offering free short-term childcare.

I can understand why they choose to walk away after they meet needs. We Christians tend to take undue advantage of people. I know that statistically speaking, about 10% of church attendees are doing 90% of the work—both physical and financial. That’s a shame.

I know many people who keep their gifts and talents well hidden from their fellow parishioners. The reason is simple—they don’t want to get sucked in and then stuck in a black hole. We’ve been known to work people into the ground and push them to the point of volunteer burnout. That burnout leads to sadness and the kind of bad feelings that cause people to leave the church in a huff.

We use people. We’ll love you and show our gratitude for your faithfulness until we find somebody newer and flashier, then we’ll kick you to the curb.

I’m ashamed of how we treat our own sometimes.

I think my friends are on to something wonderful—quietly meet the needs they are able to meet, and then move on. Jesus’ ministry was very much like that. He came to the people, assessed their physical and spiritual inadequacies, and He met them right where they lived. He then moved on. He didn’t stick around to receive accolades and praises because He knew it wasn’t about Him.

Jesus was about the work of The Father.

The physical Church cannot survive without faithful volunteers. We need to get off the pew and treat them with more kindness, respect, and appreciation. When body parts start abandoning the body, the other parts suffer.

Stop volunteer burnout. Get off the pew!

Is Your Child "Worthless"?

2010-07-20T11:29:00.001-07:00

Good Morning!

I've been out of town for a while and believe it or not--I was away from a computer. I need to get away from a computer more often!

I've got much to say, but for now, I wanted to share this video. Perhaps you've seen it. It makes my heart so sad.

This is how so many people in the world see us and how they skew what we teach our children.

There has never, ever been a single moment when I considered telling my children they were "worthless". Unbelievable!

We've got to get off the pew. We must leave the comfort zone that is our church, and reach out. If we are truly out there being Jesus with skin on, why would anyone view us in this way?

This video was produced by The Thinking Atheist. I have found that many atheists see Christians as people who do not, or will not think. We (so say the atheists) rely on faith alone, and therefore cannot back our beliefs with facts.

I believe Jesus was not only the son of God, but was a learned and brilliant man. We are people of faith, but we are also a thinking people.

I believe that the facts support our faith.

Get off the pew and be Jesus with skin on!

Covetousness in Disguise

2010-07-13T15:09:00.000-07:00

“The pastor really needs to be more humble about the car he drives. He should be setting an example of good stewardship. Instead of flaunting his wealth.”

How many of you have heard these words? Maybe you’ve contributed to a conversation where this topic has come up. We have the right to call the pastor out on the expensive car he drives, don’t we? I mean we do pay his salary, after all.

I’ve heard variations of this kind of criticism spoken about the most affluent members of the church congregation.

“The Joneses just paid $3.4 Million for that five bedroom eyesore on the corner of Magnolia and Jefferson. If they gave one tenth of their yearly salary to African missions they could feed the people in four villages for 50 years.”

We roll our eyes at the greeter’s new red dress and decide she should strive to be more welcoming and less distracting. We gawk at the new diamond ring a well-known doctor gave his wife as they could have donated the money they spent on the oversized rock to cancer research. We call the father who gives his son a new Mustang on his 16^th birthday “over-indulgent”.

When we make these kinds of comments and judgment calls, we are revealing far more about ourselves than about the person we’re trying to expose. We are making a weak attempt to disguise our covetousness with religiosity.

But wait! Surely we’re NOT covetous. We are merely showing great love and concern for our rich brothers and sisters and we want to spare them from trouble. Proverbs 28:27  says, He who gives to the poor will lack nothing, but he who closes his eyes to them receives many curses. We would hate to see curses rain down on our good friends.

In Matthew 19:21  Jesus says, If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me. We’re not jealous! We’re looking’ out for their heavenly treasure…yeah, that’s it.

We are so not perfect. Jealousy, envy, covetousness—these traits are a part of our human nature. We claim to be Christ-like while at the same time we are extremely judgmental and petty.

There may very well be people in your church family who flaunt their prosperity. Pointing our sanctimonious finger at their Jimmy Choo shoes and Calvin Klein duds won’t soften their heart.

Get of the pew of false humility and religiosity. Get of the pew!

High on Rainbow Power

2010-07-11T10:17:00.000-07:00

This double rainbow YouTube video went absolutely viral this past week. Someone even put music to it and took it to a whole new level.

Some of you might have seen "Hungrybear9562" on Good Morning America yesterday morning. He was interviewed by Bill Weir via Skype. Mr. Weir asked Rainbow Guy what he was smoking the morning he shot the video.

"I wasn't smoking anything. I was high on pure rainbow power."

You've got to admire the guy's unabashed pure joy! I want to know that kind of joy. I want to appreciate God's love and Jesus's friendship with the very same kind of fervor that Hungrybear has when he sees a double rainbow in his front yard. I'm not sure I'd post my fervor on YouTube, however.

Dear God, I accept Your apology

2010-07-08T14:55:00.000-07:00

Our 6 ½ year-old niece was prompted by her mom to say her prayers as she was being tucked into bed for the night.

“Dear God, thank you for this wonderful day...well not really. I accept your apology for making me stub my toe...”

Out of the mouths of babes. Don’t you just love the authentic honesty of a child?

As a Christ follower I believe that God is sovereign and that nothing comes as a surprise to God. He allows bad things to happen to good people for a myriad of reasons—so we will rely on him, so we’ll be a source of encouragement and comfort to others in the same situation, or to humble us or break us of our stubborn pride.

As a human I’ll admit—I sometimes feel that surely God made a mistake. He didn’t really intend for me to go through another difficult trial, or for that person to say that ugly thing to me. And, there’s no way God really expects me to be in that Bible study with that person, or those people!

And, about that toe I stubbed last week! Come on, God…what were You thinking?

I want to trust God, really I do. I want to be like James and consider it put joy whenever I face trials (James 1:2). I strive to trust that all things will work together for good because I love Him and I’ve been called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).

But sometimes…sometimes I wish God would say, “Well, it looks like I made a mistake. I meant for your neighbor’s house to flood and for his kid to rebel. My bad.” Sometimes I feel weak and overwhelmed.

But then I step back and try to look at the big picture. I know God loves me and I know He has a purpose for my life.

God loves ME and has a purpose for MY life.

I’ve tried to light a fire under my readers and get you to get off the pew. Of course, if you never get off the pew, you’ll probably never stub your toe on the stumbling blocks and detours that satan puts in your path. I get that. That’s why God invented BAND AIDS™

Now, wrap your toe, accept God’s apology…uh, I mean…trust Him, and get off the pew.

When Is Gossip Not Gossip?

2010-07-06T10:36:00.000-07:00

When is gossip not gossip? That’s easy—when it’s prayer request, of course.

I’ve sat in many a prayer circle when someone will say something like this, “Hey you guys, we really need to pray for Bob and Carol. Bob has been coming home late and talking in whispers on the phone and Carol is pretty sure he’s having an affair. Their son is having trouble in school and it seems the marital problems are affecting the kids.”

Prayer request or gossip?

A few days ago I was at a company meeting. Our manager sat with me and five or six co-workers at a round table. We rarely work together, so this was an opportunity to catch up on one another’s lives and family events, solve work-related challenges, and go over our schedule for the next few months.

Ours is a service-oriented business and we handle hundreds of customers a day. At one point during a lull in the round table conversation one of my co-workers said, “Can I share something?”

She went on to tell a story about an incident that had happened a week or so earlier at the establishment. It seems she was not working on the day in question, but happened to be a costumer. She noticed another costumer wasn’t being served in a prompt manner, so she walked over to the gentleman and said, “Have you been helped?” “No”, the customer snapped (so the story goes), “I have not!”

My off duty co-worker helped the man and his wife. She then went on to tell us that she found the employee on duty (who, by the way, was not be at our company meeting) in the lobby chatting with a small child.

“So I was wondering”, my co-worker said, “did I do something wrong? Should I not have helped the costumer?” The manager praised her for stepping in to help on her night off, and all my co-workers assured her she had in fact done the right thing.

In just a few short minutes she managed to tattle on a co-worker, brag on herself, come off as humble, and get kudos and pats on the back from her peers.

Was she gossiping or was she being a tattletale?

Gossip is an ugly word. But only good and selfless people go out of their way to share prayer requests about other people, right? Surely my co-worker wasn’t trying to make our absent friend look like a slacker, right?

Look, I can’t judge another person’s heart, any more than they can judge mine. I do know, however, that we find all kinds of creative ways to gossip and tell tales about others. It’s human nature to want people to see us in a positive light, and the easiest way to do that is to draw attention to the ugly in somebody else.

So, how many ways are there to gossip? Share your thoughts and experiences.

Get off the pew!

Illegitimate kids needing a Father

2010-07-02T18:33:00.000-07:00

An old friend and I had a short Facebook chat earlier today. We met when our families attended the same uber conservative church where he’s still a member. After catching up a bit, I asked about the church I had attended for over 13 years.

Me: How are things at church?

Him: Different. They’re dedicating illegitimate children now.

Me: Wow!

Him: Yeah. You know, they wouldn’t dedicate our grandkids when they were born.

Me: What changed?

Him: Several staff and “elite” church members had illegitimate babies born into their families and they wanted them dedicated. They had to wake up and live in the real world.

I have to confess—I was shocked (but thrilled) to hear that this particular church was now bringing unwed parents and their babies up onto the sanctuary platform for the dedication ceremony.

For those of you who aren’t churchgoers, when a new baby is born to Christian parents they bring the child to the pastor in front of the congregation. The parents agree to raise the child up to know God and the church members promise to pray for and encourage the family. The pastor prays over the child and his or her parents.

This particular church acted as if the babies born to unwed parents were unclean and contagious! Aren’t babies born to single moms just as important as any other new baby? They deserve to be dedicated to the Lord—don’t they?

When I attended that church there were a lot of very, very rigid rules. Divorced people could not teach Sunday school, musicians and actors were not allowed to perform in secular arenas, clubs, or theatres, and female staff members were not allowed to wear pants.

No, I’m not talking about the 1950’s. I’m talking about recent times. In fact, the only rule that has relaxed in the last few years is the one about woman and pants.

And now—babies born to unwed parents are being dedicated.

How sad it is that it wasn’t until church staff and “elite” family members began to be affected that the pastors finally understood the value of dedicating ALL new babies to The Lord. I hate to point out the obvious, but wasn’t Jesus an illegitimate child?

The Church sometimes fails to see The World until The World comes dancing down the aisle wearing sandals and dreadlocks and plops itself in a front row pew. I come back again to my purpose for writing this blog—to encourage you (and me) to be Jesus with skin on.

Jesus went into the world and walked with the lost, offered hope to the empty, and accepted people right where they were. He did not wait for them to come to Him!

Leaving that conservative church was a very difficult thing to do. Today I find myself wondering why it was so hard. Was I concerned that people might suspect I wasn’t “good enough” to be a member of that congregation? I think I was afraid that if I left the church people might suspect I had sinned!

I HAD to leave the church—the world was calling. You know the whole be-in-the-world-but-not-of-the-world thing? Have you met people that are so heavenly minded that they’re no earthly good? Well…that was me!

I’m okay with admitting that I’m far from perfect. I love the amazing people that I’ve had the awesome privilege to walk with, talk with, share with, and cry with. If not for my imperfections I might still be sitting on the pew in my comfortable piety and religiosity.

Get off the pew. The illegitimate kids of the world are looking for a Father. Get off the pew!

Hell - through the eyes of a 10 year-old

2010-06-30T13:07:00.000-07:00

“Imagine being 10 years old and realizing that this kind and wonderful man is going to burn in hell.”

That’s how my conversation with the 23-year-old atheist began. He grew up in a Christian family and he attended Sunday school and church each week. He believed every word of the Bible as it was taught to him.

When he was 10 the young man’s mom took him to an audition at the community theatre. He was a talented kid and he was cast in the role of “Boy Scrooge” in the stage version of the classic tale, A Christmas Carol.

The little boy immediately fell in love with the theatre and with his new extended family. The actors, the stage manager, the tech crew, and the director all took the kids in the cast under their protective and tutoring wings. The kids were called to a new level of excellence and they matured both as artists and as young people.

At some point along the way, my atheist friend learned that the director was gay. It’s not like there was an announcement of some kind, but there are few secrets in the theatre. A light bulb went off in the little boy’s 10-year-old Christian brain.

“Oh no! My director’s gonna burn in hell!”

The young man had been taught that homosexuality was an abomination to the Lord and was the worst of the worst of all the sins. Gay people—like all sinners—would die and spend eternity burning in the lake of fire.

He also knew that he had rarely experienced such kindness, consideration, and acceptance. The church can be a petty place for an artist. I wrote a post recently about how the misfit toys are drawn to a church’s drama department. The boy had experienced this firsthand and had himself felt like a misfit.

He knew he was called to a higher artistic standard than the one the church drama department had patterned for him.

He had watched his family be hurt and broken by church gossip and spineless spiritual leaders, but he still believed that God was the God of miracles and restoration. He’d watched the cliques’ form and the good church kids snub the prodigals. In spite of the bad behavior, he still trusted God.

He knew few people outside of the church and to some degree he assumed that gossip, lies, petty jealousy, and judgment passing was just a part of human nature. Now he was in a whole new environment where he was—for the first time—finding none of that. And yet…these new friends were sinners bound for hell.

It took the young man a few more years to really seek and search, and then allow himself to admit to his family that he was an atheist.

Listen, Jesus modeled for us the gospel of love and peace. He did not walk up to the woman at the well and say, “Hey, I know you’re a whore. Guess what? Unless you walk away from your heathen lifestyle, you’re going to burn in hell—for eternity!”

Jesus showed us that we are to love the sinner and to reflect who God is by accepting them where they are, and sharing with them the gospel of peace. Jesus went TO the lost and talked with them, walked with them, worked side by side with them, and loved them.

Jesus LOVED the lost.

He didn’t just hit them over the head with everything that was terrible about how they lived. Rather, He helped the sinner see how much better life could be with God. He didn’t focus on the sin. He lovingly lifted the veil from the eyes of the spiritually blind, and revealed God’s amazing plan for them.

Jesus modeled how to reflect God to the lost. He simply loved them, and people WANTED to have what He had.

My friend the atheist wants NOTHING that the Christian has to offer. Sad. So sad.

We’ve got to get off the pew and walk in the footsteps of Jesus. Get off the pew!

Banish the term"Christianity"

2010-06-25T15:45:00.000-07:00

Dan Merchant wrote, directed, produced, and starred in the thought-provoking 2008 documentary, Lord, Save Us From Your Followers. In the film Mr. Merchant seeks to answer the question, “Why is the gospel of love dividing America?”

To find the answer to that question, Merchant put on a pair of white coveralls and stuck religious bumper stickers (both pro and con) all over his body. He called himself “Bumpersticker Man”.

Bumpersticker Man went all over America with a camera and a microphone, and invited people to check out his costume and share their thoughts about Jesus and Jesus followers. People all over the country openly shared their opinions and beliefs about God and the people who profess to be His kids.

Merchant found that most people who have a problem with Christians do NOT have a problem with Jesus.

When asked what Jesus was known for, the respondents said things like, savior, diversity, good guy, loving, saving the lost, dying on the cross, performing miracles (or magic), bearded, philanthropist, and sincere. One girl said Jesus was the “first punk rocker”.

When asked to give a word or two that describes who or what a Christian is, the answers were far different. The men and women on the street used words like, hypocrites, intolerance, hate, frightening, overpowering, rigid, scary, nothing good, psycho, out of touch, uneducated, etc…

We profess to be followers of the well-respected God-man who shared the gospel of love and peace. Even the people that profess to be atheists acknowledge that the mythical man called Jesus was supposedly a good guy.

So, why is there such a disconnect between who Jesus is and who His followers are?

Kip Jacob, the senior pastor of Southlake Foursquare Church in West Linn, Oregon offers the following explanation. “We don’t trust Grace. We feel like we have to be defenders of the truth.” Pastor Jacob goes on to ask, “What if the church was known not for what it’s against, but what it’s for?” Wow!

I went to YouTube and looked at tons of clips from the documentary, as well as several interviews with Dan Merchant. Everyone from Matt Lauer to the Reverend Robert Schuller treated Merchant with respect and kindness. The filmmaker deserves that courtesy because he shows respect to believers and unbelievers alike. He seeks to give a platform for open and honest dialogue.

I did find a video rebuttal to the film that I thought was interesting. A big man, with a full head of gray hair and a silver beard sat in front of his computer camera and recorded his thoughts about Mr. Merchant and Lord, Save Us From Your Followers.

The man calls himself “Curtlegger”, and he believes Dan Merchant should be worried about the day when he meets Jesus face to face. He’s pretty sure Jesus is none to happy with Bumpersticker Man.

Curtlegger believes that Jesus did not say people would know we are believers because of how we love the WORLD, but how we love one another—the unity between Christian brothers and sisters. He further insists that Jesus specifically told us NOT to love the world.

Uh…Mr. Curtlegger, how’s that love-within-the-body-of-Christ thing workin’ for ya? Our lack of love for one another is the single biggest reason the world does NOT see Jesus in us. We treat one another like…well…like crap!

If we love somebody, we go out of our way to learn the best of who they are. But we Christians aren’t very good at looking for the good in our pew-mates. We’re notorious for sitting on our religious high horse and perfecting our Pharisee impersonation. “Thank you God that I am not like that guy over there. His marriage is a mess and his kids are trouble!”

Jesus didn’t go around telling people he was right. He went around showing people God’s love. He didn’t just walk with the disciples and the believers, he hung out with people of the world. That’s right, Curtlegger, the WORLD! He loved. I mean He REALLY loved.

What if Christians were known NOT for what we’re against, but for what we are commanded to do…to love? Are you willing to banish the term “Christianity” in order to further The Gospel of Love?

Get off the pew. It’s covered with bumper stickers and titles. And you know what? It’s not all that welcoming. I don’t want to be a Christian. I want to be a reflection of Jesus!

Get off the pew!

Artistic Mediocrity

2010-06-22T22:26:00.000-07:00

So…do you remember the “misfit toys” from the 1964 Christmas classic, “Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer’? The misfits were badly built toys—they were mistakes. The toys didn’t fit, they didn’t belong, and no one wanted them.

Rudolph was a misfit. He and his red nose were teased and laughed at. What could that mammal and his bulbous schnoz ever do for the reindeer colony?

About fifteen years ago I started using the term “misfit toys” to describe church drama teams. I have never seen a bigger flock of odd birds in my life.

At the time I was working with a church drama director who gathered up the most un-actor like people she could find and created a drama team. She spoke truth when she said, “they need to belong”.

This week I’m working with a group of volunteers who are acting their way through a week of Vacation Bible School skits.

My team consists of guys and girls who are without a real job and therefore have the time to volunteer their talents, such as they are. Their talent as a thespian (or lack thereof) is not what bothers me. It’s their inability to commit and invest the talent they do have.

The young men and women who make up our little acting troupe find the following character traits optional: punctuality, preparedness, and proficiency.

When it comes to art in the church, Christians think in terms of the five loaves and two fishes that Jesus used to feed the five thousand. We bring Jesus a fish and we expect him to wave a magic wand and create a whale right before the eyes of the audience.

Please understand this…Christians with true talent and abilities would love to use their gifts to share God’s love and truth with the body. They, however, don’t want to compromise—nor should they.

God gave us many and varied gifts and talents. The truth is, none of us are misfits. We belong somewhere. God created us for a place and a purpose—the stage may not be that place, however.

Rudolph found meaning to life when he discovered his unique value. Without him, the light would never have been seen.

We would never let the mechanic preach the sermon, the accountant do open heart surgery, or the chef teach a college physics class. Get off the pew of mediocrity and set a higher standard for Christian art. Get off the pew!

Turf Wars

2010-06-18T11:59:00.000-07:00

“The church is like an old girlfriend. I have a lot of good memories and I wave as I pass by her house, but I’ll never be in a relationship with her again.”

I ran into an old friend last night and that’s how he describes the church he attended for 30 years, but left some time back.

What is it about a church that stirs such high emotions? I mean it’s just a building, for heaven’s sake! It’s four walls and a roof. But when people leave a church—for whatever reason—coming back is nearly impossible.

The people inside the building become a gang and the church property is their turf. When you leave and go to another church, you break the gang code and an all out turf war ensues. It all looks like a scene from the musical Westside Story.

The Eastside Baptist Jets battle the Southside Baptist Sharks for membership, musicians, and AWANA numbers. Gang members—uh…I mean, church attendees—sometimes sneak over to enemy territory to do a bit of undercover snooping.

You can almost hear the Westside Story score swell up as the sleuth slips past the barricade—uh…door greeter—and takes his seat in the back pew. Get cool, boy. Stay loose, boy. Come back with answers, boy.

What kinda programs are they offering? Do they ascribe to the big class Bible-study philosophy, or are they a small-group kinda church? Do they have a choir or a praise band? And the bulletin…is the artwork on the cover traditional or avant-garde? Do they put the lyrics to songs up on the big screen, or do they use hymnals?

A friend of mine was edged out of the church she’d grown up in. A couple of years later she decided to attend the Women’s Retreat that was sponsored by her former church. The women’s ministries director called her and told her it might not be a good idea for my friend to go to the retreat. It might be, she said, “a distraction”.

They were suspicious as to why my friend wanted to come back to the old neighborhood. Turf wars.

My friend went to the retreat anyway. Guess what, not a single fight broke out! In fact, God did a healing work during that weekend.

Come on people, “the church” is supposed to be “one body”. The building is just that—a building!

So, are you the old girlfriend, or are you the shunned lover? Do you know someone who no longer feels welcome inside the four walls that house your congregation? Get off the pew, break down the walls and barriers, and call off the gang fight! Say no to turf wars. Get off the pew!

No reconciliation for you!

2010-06-16T09:49:00.000-07:00

I called and asked for a meeting with the pastor. It’d been several years since we’d attended the church, but the emotions were still raw and the pain was still real. My child encouraged me to once again seek reconciliation.

I’d always been open to restoration with the Music Minister and I had sought it on a couple of other occasions. He, however, wasn’t interested. So, I went directly to the big guy—the man who’d been leading the church for well over 40 years.

I walked in the office and sat down in the overstuffed chair. It seemed like I was 25 feet from the pastor. He had the biggest desk I’d ever seen in my life. A lot of granite had to die for that desk.

The pastor was familiar with my story. He knew we’d been forced to leave the church, but he wasn’t aware of all the nuts and bolts.

I had no interest in recounting all the ugly details—I only hoped for reconciliation and restoration. I’d do whatever it took to forgive and be forgiven.

The pastor’s words shocked me, although I’m not sure why. You’d think by that point I would have understood that the condemnation and judgmental finger pointing was a part of the church’s DNA.

The minister folded his hands, leaned slightly forward, and in his finest Southern gentleman drawl said, “We don’t have to reconcile with you. You work in the theatre and therefore, you are a danger to our reputation.”

And, there it is.

I don’t even know what to say to that. All I know is the pastor needs to step out from behind the behemoth that is his desk, get off the pew, and see that Christians live in the real world. We have many and varied talents, and sometimes Christians dare to work in film, television, and the theatre!

There are times when I seriously can’t figure out what it is about Christians that draw people to God. That day, sitting in the pristine office of an old Southern pastor, was one of those times. I didn’t see Jesus in his eyes. I saw a Pharisee who effectively said, “Thank you God that I’m not like this person.”

Get off the pew!

Around Whom Do You Revolve?

2010-06-14T07:21:00.000-07:00

A new pastor took over the reigns of our fairly large church a little over a year ago. He had the full endorsement of the search committee and he quickly won over the church family. He garnered 98% of the member vote.

And now? Well, he’s lost a few supporters.

Change is met with opposition 100% of the time. But, the change that’s taking place now has turned into a disturbing trend. Most all of the outreach ministries have been seriously limited, or cut all together. Unless it directly revolves around the Sunday sermon, it will no longer be allowed at our church.

To begin with, any ministry that reached a specific group has been cut. There is no longer a “Men’s Ministry”, or a “Women’s Ministry”. All meetings, retreats, and celebrations specific to one gender or the other have been cancelled.

Gone are the monthly M.O.P.S. (Mother Of Pre-Schoolers) meetings, and all weekly Bible studies. The AWANA kids have been relegated to tiny broken down classrooms so the gym can be remodeled into a second sanctuary.

Small home groups—numbering no more than eight people—have replaced Bible study groups. They are all required to study the same material—material that is based on the pastor’s weekly sermons. The Women’s Ministries leader has been reassigned. She now writes the pastor’s sermon-based studies.

The church gym was originally built to accommodate the huge number of kids and youth who filled the campus several times during the week. It’s going to be remodeled so it can accommodate the many services now held every Sunday.

The latest casualty of the new regime is a longtime favorite—“Gospel Music” night. One Sunday evening a month a favorite singing group was brought in to share God through song and old-fashioned fun. The church is always full on Gospel Music night and is a particular favorite among the 50 and older crowd. Those are gone now too.

The new pastor isn’t getting rid of the much-loved music altogether, he’s just rolling it into a new Sunday morning service. If you want to hear the old-fashioned Gospel music, you’ll now have to sit through the pastor’s sermon as well.

Each of the now six services on Sunday mornings will feature a different style of music. The Pastor’s sermon will then be preached live, or will be shown via DVD.

Bible studies, concerts, programs…anything that happens on the church campus must revolve around the pastor’s sermon. Does this strike anyone else as odd—maybe even scary?

Our new pastor has completely cut off most of the other body parts. He clearly sees no use for the many gifts and talents of the family. He acts as if he doesn’t believe God can speak to the congregation through anyone that isn’t him.

God speaks to His kids in many and varied ways. God’s love and truth can be shared during a basketball game, a musical event, or a **gasp** guest speaker.

Is your church pastor-focused or God-focused?

Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18 (NIV) Have we set our pastor up for a fall?

Come on people, get off the pew and take a hard look at the direction the church is moving. Get off the pew!

Rhonda Gets A Divorce

2010-06-12T11:54:00.000-07:00

Several years ago I sang in the choir with Rhonda. She had an amazing voice, a good heart, and was just as beautiful on the outside as she was on the inside.

One day Rhonda shocked everyone when she left her husband. She immediately became rich fodder for the gossipmongers. Everyone had an opinion about Rhonda and her husband. People took sides and the battle began.

Rhonda auditioned for a part in a musical at the local community theatre. That’s when the tongue wagging really got out of control. Rhonda was “living in sin” and she was clearly a “girl gone wild”. The choir director kicked her out of the choir and she left the church filled with sadness and loneliness.

A few months later I was home alone when there was a knock at my door. It was Rhonda’s husband. He had no idea I lived in the house. He was a contractor who was going door-to-door leaving flyers in an attempt to solicit business. When he saw me he immediately opened his heart.

“I’m very sad about the way Rhonda’s been treated at the church.” He sounded so genuine. His words surprised me. Wasn’t he the victim? Hadn’t his wife walked out on him?

He continued. “It wasn’t easy being married to me. I moved Rhonda from town to town and state to state every six months or so. I oppressed her and never gave her an opportunity to explore her unique talents. I always made the marriage about me.”

I was overwhelmed with a sense of guilt. I had listened to the gossip and I had participated in the harsh judgmental criticisms. I had assumed that Rhonda was being selfish.

Rhonda’s husband stood before me—he wasn’t playing the victim, but rather he was taking responsibility for the part he played in the destruction of his marriage. The fact that his wife had been the subject of unfair gossip and had been abandoned by her church broke his heart.

I’ve seen Rhonda several times over the years and I always go out of my way to listen—really listen to her words and her heart. She has shared her brokenness, her anger, her disappointment, and her loneliness. She has always thanked me for my kindness.

I saw my friend Rhonda last night. She is doing great. All the people who decided she was a woman scorned and therefore no longer worthy of their love and friendship—they are the losers. They’ve missed out on the friendship of a wonderful woman. They’ve missed out on seeing new growth come out of ashes.

Do you know a “Rhonda”? Yes, God hates divorce, but he loves His kids. I believe that our gossip and judgmental assumptions are responsible for putting the final nail in some of the marital coffins. It’s hard to see a reason to stay married to someone that everyone around you says is a horrible person.

We’ve got to STOP being meddling scandalmongers. If you know a couple whose marriage is falling apart please love them. As difficult as it is, I encourage you to not take sides, but rather to show both of them equal kindness.

Now go…get off the pew!

Discouraged? Us too!

2010-06-10T15:40:00.000-07:00

We went to the theatre last night and we shared our table with a couple we’d never met. We introduced ourselves and shared polite chitchat.

The more we talked, the more we realized we had a lot in common with each other. We’d graduated from high school around the same time; our parents had attended the same school, and even graduated the same year. Each couple had three kids. Our children were just about the same ages as theirs. We discovered we even worked in the same fields and had similar interests.

It wasn’t long before someone brought up church. The conversation went something like this:

Us: Have you ever been to this theatre before?

Them: No. This is our first time. You?

Us: We’ve been coming to see shows here for years. You’ll love it.

Them: The theatre seems pretty full tonight. Is the turnout this good every night?

Us: The Sunday matinees are hard to get tickets for as they’re always full. The after-church crowd comes straight from the service, gets here for the all-you-can-eat buffet, enjoys the show, and gets home in time to be in bed by 5:30. It’s the perfect Sunday.

Them: Sundays are exhausting for us. We’ve got to go straight home after church and take a nap.

Okay, we aren’t the most stimulating of conversationalists, I admit. But that’s how we discovered we were all churchgoers. Turns out we’ve even gone to the same church, but at different times.

It didn’t take long for the topic of Christian discord to come up. I don’t ask for it or encourage this topic—I promise. People open up to me. The fact is people are disgusted with the constant barrage of conflict and backbiting among believers.

The couple told the all too familiar tale. The older their kids got, the more involved with church activities they became. Since they were there all the time anyway, they began volunteering for this ministry, that opportunity, and before they knew they were overcommitted. They taught Sunday school and worked with the kids’ choir. That’s what you do when you’re a member of a church, right?

Church members like the couple we met burn their candles at both ends, then we (the church) see to it that they get burned out. We treat volunteers badly. They are often under trained and overextended. We set them up for failure and then spit them out when they fail.

That’s what happened to the man and his wife. They are content now to sit in a different church then the one they had poured so much of their heart and hard work into. These are two talented people whose gifts could benefit the kingdom of God, but instead their talents have been shelved.

We suck sometimes. We are wounding our own and shooting the wounded. It’s just not okay.

Churches would be perfect if there were no people in them. I’m not talking about the normal struggles and frustrations that come with working side by side with other human beings. I’m talking about the mean, vindictive, ugly, self-absorbed behavior that breaks the spirit.

A pastor friend of mine always says, “People are no damn good.”

I meet more and more believers who have opted out of the church machine. They’ve formed home churches, online communities, and small groups. They’re not isolating themselves, but rather they are separating themselves from the gossip, lies, arrogance, and self-promoting pompous pretentiousness that gets in the way of seeing—really seeing God.

Show one another love, appreciation, kindness, benevolence, sympathy, and gratitude. God’s family (like most families) is dysfunctional and far from perfect, and that’s okay! Selfless love can heal the bad stuff. Get off the pew and show God’s love for your brothers and sisters. Get off the pew!

One toke over the line...

2010-06-09T11:22:00.001-07:00

Earlier this year I was in Los Angeles. On my way to the airport, I spotted this sign in front of a church.

That's one way to get 'em in the pew. I wonder if they served snacks.

Voting Day

2010-06-08T22:53:00.000-07:00

Question…on voting day, do you care who or what James Dobson endorses?

Many voters color in the oval next to the name on the ballot solely because of the single letter that comes at the end of the candidate's name—“R” or “D”.

A few weeks before each election my extended family picks up a copy of the Christian Voter Guide and we gather for a “who would Jesus vote for” party. I’ll be honest—I’ve been known to **gasp** throw my support behind the unsanctioned candidate.

The primary election was held today in my state. One of the congressional candidates used to be the mayor of a nearby town. He’s an outspoken Christian who garnered the support of Focus on the Family founder James Dobson.

The man who followed in the candidate’s mayoral footsteps is now a radio commentator who also happens to be a vocal Christian. The radio show’s host has nothing nice to say about his predecessor and congressional hopeful. In fact, he’s been down right nasty, calling the former mayor a liar and a thief.

Christians stand on Biblical truth, armed with the sword and the shield, and we come out swinging. Christians can be so arrogant sometimes!

I wonder—if the two Christian men were in a political race against one another, which one would win the endorsement of religious leaders?

Should a candidate, proposition, or ballot measure be pulpit fodder? Is it okay for a pastor to offer his opinion or advice on political matters? I’ve known church leaders who feel very strongly about staying out of this controversial arena, and others who feel a duty to inform—even going so far as to put up proposition signs around the church campus.

Look, we have an obligation to vote and to vote our conscience. We ought not be sheep who blindly follow the spiritual leaders. God gave me the intelligence and wherewithal to gather the available information and then to cast a discerning vote.

Don’t be sheep. Get off the pew—ask questions, educate yourself, and vote with wise confidence. Get off the pew!

Third time's the charm.

2010-06-07T10:49:00.000-07:00

A couple of nights ago we went to a wedding reception. Don and Deanne were first engaged in 1980, but they broke up and married other people. It’s so great to see them together now—happy and looking forward to sharing many years of happy love.

When we arrived at the reception Don’s dad hugged us, thanked us for coming, and said, “Someone from the church has got to reach out and love my son.” His words broke my heart.

Don’s first marriage ended when his wife left him for another man. Everyone who knew the couple was shocked and saddened by the completely unexpected turn.

When a couple divorces they have to divide the furniture, wall hangings, dishes, and towels. They argue over custody of the kids, dogs, cats, and goldfish. If all goes well, each partner walks away with half the shared physical assets and the kids continue to thrive.

The saddest element of divorce is the division of friendships. Perhaps it wouldn’t be so awful if the husband and wife could sit with a mediator and weigh the pros and cons of every person in their life, then amicably agree to split time and custody. It doesn’t work that way.

Generally speaking, friends and family choose sides and everyone dons weapons fashioned from gossip, assumptions, lies, and judgment. It’s a terrible phenomenon and there are no winners.

The church supported Don in his divorce. After all, adultery is a church sanctioned reason for ending a marriage. Don remarried a year or two later and he stayed in the church’s good graces. That all ended when he divorced his second wife.

After his second divorce Don lost most of the remainder of his friends. His pastor warned him to “never step foot” in the church again.

"I hate divorce," says the LORD God of Israel, "and I hate a man's covering himself with violence as well as with his garment," says the LORD Almighty. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith. 1 Malachi 2:16 (NIV)

There’s no doubt God hates divorce, but I know that I know that God LOVES the divorcee. Loving a friend and standing by him or her when their marriage falls apart is (I believe) what God calls us to do. Divorce is not a contagious disease. You won’t need antibiotics if you get too close to someone suffering the ravages of a marital break-up—I promise.

Sin happens when we break fellowship with God. We then suffer through our anger, bitterness, depression, and all manner of emotional distress. The sadness is magnified when we suffer alone and the people who should be Jesus with skin on abandon us in our hour of need.

Do you know someone who is out of fellowship with God or with the church? Get off the pew, pick up the phone, and reconnect. Send them a card or letter—anything to extend a hand of love and support. You won’t get infected, I promise you! Get off the pew!

Nepotism in The Church

2010-06-05T23:25:00.000-07:00

Nepotism is alive and well—especially in The Church. Nepotism is defined as “Favoritism shown to relatives or close friends by those with power or influence.”

One of the mega-churches in town has all the members of one family on its payroll. The church hired the music minister’s son after he was fired from another church. The second son is the children’s ministries pastor, and his father-in-law is also on the staff.

At the same mega-church, a board member's son was hired to be the Junior High School Pastor. Unfortunately, that young man has never attended college and he is woefully under qualified to teach young people and lead a department. That is nepotism at its worse—and a bad way to run a business.

We’re certainly not alone in this practice, as there are companies all over the world—large and small—that are filled with co-workers who share the same DNA. There are certainly good reasons for doing business this way.

Sons and daughters are groomed from birth to be the perfect employee. I think of real estate mogul, Donald Trump’s family. The three eldest Trump kids all work for their father. I feel sure that “The Donald” saw to it that those kids got the education and experience they needed to be perfect vice presidents for the Trump organization.

Hey, putting your kids on the payroll saves a lot of time and energy that would have been wasted interviewing potential employees. When a father hires his son he can wave all those pesky background checks, and the exorbitant fees that go with them. After all, Dad knows about most of the skeletons in the family closet.

Kids follow in the footsteps of their parents all the time. It’s natural, of course, since we inherit strengths and talents from our Mom and Dad. Those traits lead us to jobs for which we are a good fit. In addition, we’re all drawn to the familiar—such as the family business.

Hollywood has its famous acting families. There’s the Barrymore family, Kirk Douglas and his boys, and Lloyd Bridges, who along with his actress wife, Dorothy raised actor sons Beau and Jeff. These are just a few of so many possible examples.

Christianity has its royal families too. Billy Graham’s kids Anne and Franklin have followed their dad into the family business, as have the kids of Robert Schuller, Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson, and John Hagee.

I don’t snub the practice of nepotism in church hiring practices completely, but I do believe that those in leadership need to be careful. We must be very sure that the people on the payroll are the best possible man or woman for the job. We ought to hold ourselves to a high accountability—higher than most.

I’ve asked this question before…what is your church’s business model? We represent God to the world, and we should be setting the standard. Get off the pew!

Writing Notes

2010-06-04T12:10:00.000-07:00

Have you ever written a note to your pastor, worship leader, or church board? Christians love to write notes—especially nasty notes!

It seems the worship leader gets the bulk of the condemning comments. We think we aren’t singing enough hymns , we complain about the horns being too loud, or we lament the “7-11” praise songs. Those are the worship tunes wherein we sing the same seven words eleven times.

We criticize the church board for how and where they spend money, we chastise the pastor for preaching too long (hey, we’ve got to get to Applebee’s), and we fuss over which version of the Bible is God-approved.

What do all these complaints have in common? They are focused on us—me, me, me!

The big bulk of the ugly notes received by pastors, worship leaders, board members, and church staff are motivated by a selfish desire to personalize church. We’re not always interested in seeing the big picture. Rather, we focus on the little self-portrait we’ve painted of our perfect church—with us in the center.

I have to use readers—the cheap little glasses that help me see the words in books, newspapers, and the like. They’re great for close up reading, but are completely useless for seeing things in the distance. Everything beyond the stretch of my arm is blurry and out of focus.

Are you looking at church through a close-up lens that prevents you from seeing the big picture? Are you so busy critiquing every element of each Sunday service that you have lost sight of the purpose of the church?

The church is one body made up of many parts. We represent many and varied tastes in music, literature, clothing style, and entertainment. Likewise, we represent a cornucopia of ideas—thoughts about how best to “do” church.

We should, however, have one purpose—to reach and serve the world for Jesus.

Take off the rose-colored glasses that keep you focused on your here and now self. It’s okay to offer suggestions and to let your opinions and heart be known. I encourage you, however, to check your motive before submitting that written critique. Are you concerned about something the church is doing that is contradictory to the word of God, or simply in opposition to your own personal taste? If it’s the latter…you might want to put your pen away.

Satan works hard to discourage a church staff and its volunteers—BELIEVE ME! He’s most successful when he uses parishioners to deliver the heavy oppositional blows.

So, put the pen back in your pocket. If you don’t like the way something in your church is being done, get off the pew and volunteer to serve. Get off the pew!

Come As You Are

2010-06-02T07:21:00.000-07:00

I wonder if the church is ready for this kind of a "come as you are" campaign. Check out this video.

Thoughtful.

How could you?

2010-06-01T23:27:00.000-07:00

“How could you turn your back on your Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who gave you such a wonderful family?” Boy, mothers sure know how to pour on the guilt.

Whether it’s the family we were born into, or the family we inherited when we gave our heart to the Lord—sometimes we butt heads with the people we love and care about. The mere fact that I disagree with my loved ones now and then does not, by any stretch of the imagination, mean that I’ve turned my back on my Lord.

I can understand, however, the temptation to judge a person’s heart. We tend to hold to certain traditions and expectations and if others don’t look the part, we judge them. It’s a part of the human condition.

The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7b (NIV)

I’m reminded of a conversation I had with a co-worker a year or so ago. One of the church’s former pastors was forced to resign after it came to light that he was having an affair. There was so much sadness and brokenness.

Because of the affair, two homes were destroyed, and a church family was shattered. When pastors fall (and they sometimes do), parishioners choose sides, faith is shaken, and heartbreak spreads like a virus through the body.

The former pastor’s name came up when my co-worker was recounting to me some of the biggest challenges the church has faced in her 30 years of membership. “That pastor is still unrepentant.” She seemed sure of the condition of the man’s heart.

“How do you know that?” I asked. She answered with authority. “It’s obvious.”

I didn’t press her for an explanation, as I really didn’t want to get caught in a gossip-fest with my cubicle mate. But I wondered what criteria she might be using to judge the man.

A few days later I was visiting with my sister-in-law when she told me that the disgraced former pastor had been the guest speaker at her church. She beamed as she recounted his story of sin, restoration, healing, and forgiveness.

I went on-line so I could download the podcast of his message. It was encouraging, powerful, and so inspirational. There is life after death and destruction, and the pastor was living in victory over sin. Amazing.

Whatever criteria my friend was using to judge the former sinner’s heart, her conclusion was wrong. In the same way, it is wrong to assume a person has turned away from God just because they disagree with a fellow believer now and again.

Are you sitting on the pew of finger pointing and name-calling? Well, get off the pew! God sees what the human eye cannot see. Sometimes we just have to trust the fact that He’s at work. Now get off the pew!

Unconditional Love, pt. 2

2010-05-28T12:15:00.002-07:00

On Wednesday I wrote about my friendship with a young man who happens to be gay. I pointed out that my gay friends do not see the Christian community as a group of people who love them unconditionally.

I’m speaking in generalities here. I know that not ALL Christians separate themselves from homosexuals, but it’s so much more common than it ought to be. I know many gay believers who love God and desire to honor Him.

The picture I used a couple of days ago is the same one I’m using today. A copy of this painting hung in my grandparents’ home when I was a little girl, and over the years I’ve seen the picture on walls in many a Sunday school classroom. In the picture we see Jesus knocking on a door and waiting to be let in.

Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me. Revelation 3:20 (NIV)

So, before Jesus goes door to door, do you think He pulls out His address book of hearts? Maybe He says something like, “Oh, I see this place belongs to a gay man named Steve. I won’t be knockin’ on that door!”

Can you picture Jesus calling on a hurting woman who asks if she could bring her girlfriend along? “What?” Jesus seems surprised. “The Father didn’t tell me you were gay!”

I’m not here to debate the rightness or wrongness of gay relationships. But if you believe homosexuality is a sin, why is it treated differently than any other sin? Do you not have friends who lie, steal, cheat, commit adultery, drink too much, use drugs, or gossip to excess?

Sin is sin is sin is sin!

Jesus hung out with prostitutes, murderers, liars, thieves, cheaters, and dead guys! We have the awesome opportunity—and I believe, responsibility—to be Jesus with skin on. Jesus never failed to show unconditional love and perfect grace. God gives us the power to do the same.

Don’t get me wrong…Jesus doesn’t want anyone to remain in sin. During His life, Jesus showed people God’s love and they wanted to have what He had. He went to where the hurting hearts lived, and He loved them.

Christians have been given a bad name because of the ugly behavior of a few. Reverend Fred Phelps and his Westboro Baptist Church picket funerals of dead soldiers because they believe the fighting men and women died supporting a country that defends homosexuality. They believe that “God’s hatred is one of His holy attributes”.

People like Fred Phelps and the Westboro Baptist Church ought to be ashamed of themselves, and we should be rising up against their homophobic and anti-Semitic hate and rhetoric.

The antics of that group of extremists is just one of the many ugly happenings we should stand against. Why would anyone want anything to do with the God we profess to emulate when we can be so judgmental and condemning?

Get off the pew of passivity and denial. Stop making excuses for ugly Christians and love—really love all God’s kids! We need to be Jesus with skin on! Get off the pew!

Unconditional Love

2010-05-26T07:00:00.001-07:00

Facebook is responsible for connecting me with many long ago friends. Oh sure, it’s spawned its share of drama, but that’s because Facebook brings out the “junior high” in everyone. But I digress.

Today I had lunch with a friend I’ve reconnected with through Facebook. He’s smart, talented, kind, conservative, and he just so happens to be gay.

It was great to catch up with my old friend. We got to know each other maybe 13 years ago when we worked on a show together. He was so young when I met him and he’s grown into a kind, hardworking young man who’s faced challenges and sadness with grace.

My friend told me something I find heartbreakingly sad. He told me I was the only Christian he’d ever met who he felt truly liked him. He told me he remembers a time when I had his back and he appreciates me.

In 1994 I worked with a fabulous woman who happened to be gay. She said words very close to the ones I heard today—she told me I was one of the only Christians she’d ever met who treated her with respect and kindness. She told me she genuinely liked me, and she sensed that I felt the same about her. I did.

I find it incredibly sad that my gay friends do not readily see Christians as a community who love people unconditionally. These two people do not exactly live in a bubble. I mean it’s not like I’m the only believer they’ve ever met. But I’m the “only Christian” to ever love them—unconditionally love them.

Get off the pew of hate and love your neighbor. What would Jesus do? Who would Jesus love? Get off the pew!

God Made Me Do It

2010-05-25T10:02:00.000-07:00

I got an email this morning from Marc Hartzman, author of the book, “God Made Me Do It”. This is the first I’ve heard of this book, so I can’t comment on the quality of the material, but I can say—it looks very interesting.

I think it takes a great deal of confidence (maybe arrogance) to say, “God told me_____” (fill in the blank). I absolutely know what it means to hear that tiny voice in my heart or my head and to know I’ve heard the voice of God. But, I’m very careful about with whom I share.

In fact, I won’t even let myself fully embrace “the voice” until I’ve prayed about it, made sure the words lines up with the Bible, and I’ve talked about it with a trusted Christian mentor. I’ve never been given a prophesy detailing what someone else is supposed to do, although the Holy Spirit has given me profound wisdom and knowledge to help me deal with certain others in my life.

I wrote a post several months ago called, "Truth and Prophecy". It was written a few months before Oral Roberts passed away. In the post I recounted Reverend Roberts encounter with the 900 foot tall Jesus, and other prophecies. He was famous for his "God told me" statements.

Marc’s email reminded me of a story told several years ago by the Worship Pastor of a large church. He said he was in the hallway one Sunday morning and a parishioner stopped him and said, “God told me that if I saw you this morning I was to share this with you. I feel that we are wrongly leaving the old hymns behind. God wants you to sing more hymns during our worship time.”

The music leader said he thanked the woman for her comment and encouragement and he continued on his way through the hall to his office. Just as he unlocked the door, another church member approached him.

“I prayed about something this morning, and I knew that if I saw you, I was to share this.” The pastor’s ears perked up and he was listening. Maybe this was confirmation from the Lord about the hymns. Okay. The man went on, “God wants us sing more modern worship songs. He’s trying to reach more seekers.”

Wow! What does God want? Hymns or hip and new worship songs?

First of all, just hang out in the hall for a few minutes, and the music pastor will eventually make his way into your path. Therefore, claiming that God only wanted you to share your prophecy if you “saw” the pastor sounds a little fishy. You’re gonna see the worship leader in the hall on Sunday morning!

Secondly, we need to be very careful that we aren’t using God to carry out our own personal agenda. What’s wrong with saying, “Hey Pastor, I really love the old hymns, and I’d like to sing more of them on Sunday morning”? Or, “the new worship songs are just awesome. Let’s sing more of those!”

Get off the pew and be more discerning. I have no doubt that God uses that still small voice to stir my heart. Sometimes the words are loud and strong. “Hey! Get off the pew!"

God told me...

2010-05-22T13:36:00.000-07:00

Several years ago my cousin told us that God told her to stop cutting her hair and only wear shades of white.

Don’t ya love it when God gives fashion advice? I wish God would tell me how to wear my hair and what clothes to put on each day. That would seriously make my mornings less stressful, and—since I’m pretty sure God has great taste—I would most assuredly always look fabulous.

Over the years God has “told” my cousin many things, and she has passed these bits of truth on to as many people as will listen. Last year she told me I was “in the belly of the whale”. She said my “words” were ugly. When I asked her what specifically she was talking about she said, “When you are ready to hear the truth, my dear cousin, I’ll be here”. Um…?

About the time she went “all white” is when I distanced myself from her. I love her, but she’s terribly judgmental and critical of my relationship with God. It doesn’t “look” like she thinks it ought to look, so therefore, it must be wrong.

A few months ago, my zealot cousin took me to task for separating myself from her. She believes it’s my fear of being intimate with God that keeps me at arm’s length from her.

I’m amazed at how often I hear this kind of “it’s you and not me” finger pointing in the church. When asked about broken relationships I’ve heard the following explanations—just to name a few.

“She’s intimidated by my gifts.” “She’s jealous of me.” “He just didn’t want to share the drum throne with me, so I quit the band.”

Are there people in your life with whom you were once very close, but have pulled away from you? Try something really daring…ask them why. Then, really listen with an open heart and hearing ears. Maybe, just maybe, it’s you. Maybe, just maybe, it’s me.

Get off the pew of self-absorbed spiritual arrogance and really listen—to God and to friends who might be missing in action. If it’s me, I want to know. Get off the pew!

Ramming Roadblocks

2010-05-20T08:13:00.000-07:00

“God must not have wanted it to happen this week, because He allowed one obstacle after another to get in the way.”

I used to be the Director of Drama Ministries at a mega-church. Only in church ministry are volunteers and employees allowed to use the above-mentioned excuse to not get their work done!

After all, who are we to second-guess what God’s plan for the week is? What kind of a Christian would we be if we forced our agenda when God clearly had something else in mind? Please! I can see God rolling His eyes and saying, “don’t blame your laziness on me!”

One of the women I worked with used the “God…obstacles” excuse all the time. Our job was to come up with creative elements for the Sunday morning services—like dramas and videos.

The pastor would provide us with a month’s worth of sermon topics. Then the worship pastor would choose songs that supported the message. Finally, our team would look for short drama sketches that added another funny, thoughtful, or poignant layer to the whole Sunday morning picture. Often, we’d write our own scripts.

I loved our team of talented actors, writers, directors, and tech crew. Most of them poured their gifts and heart into creating God-inspired, high quality art.

My personal code of ethics drives me to follow through on my commitments and promises. As a believer, I’m inclined to believe that the more obstacles mark my path, the more Satan wants to put the kibosh on the project…which makes me pray up and work that much harder to get it done.

But, how do you know for sure that God isn’t the one slowing the project down? How do we rightly distinguish between God closing a door, and a simple Satan snag?

I believe we ought to keep plowing forward. We need to use prayer and old-fashioned stick-to-itiveness to break barriers, ram roadblocks, and hack hurdles. I’d rather know that I was faithful to what God called me to do then to be guilty of blaming Him for my slothfulness. If I don’t do what He’s asked of me, He’ll call someone else.

So, get off the pew of laziness and run the race all the way to the finish line. Let’s commit to stop using God as an excuse for putting our selfish pursuits ahead of Him. Get off the pew!

But God's leading...isn't He?

2010-05-17T13:17:00.000-07:00

I'll toss this question out into the blogosphere in hopes it bounces around a bit and comes back to me in the form of an answer.

Suppose a church body spends two years searching for a new pastor. This particular church has a proud history of serving the city, community, and neighborhood.

After 35 years of faithful service, their beloved bigger-than-life pastor died several years ago. In their grief, the congregation acted quickly to replace him (not that he was replaceable). The right man turned out to not be the right guy after all. The past decade has been turbulent, and a few pastors have come and gone—taking family members with them, and leaving sadness in their place.

So, the search committee takes its time. 800 attendees fill out extensive surveys. They answer a myriad of questions about the “right” pastor, including questions about what they were looking for in his education, preaching style, family, etc...

In addition, the survey participants are asked to share their thoughts on the use of music and the arts in the church. Once all the answers from 5-page questionnaire are processed, a sketch of the new “right” guy emerges.

The search committee combs over the many applications that come in from all over the country. They follow up on all the leads. The new pastor is found—at last.

So, a year after the new pastor is installed, he’s taking the church in a completely different direction than the one he was hired to take. He admits it. He believes God has given him a new directive.

And now, the question…

At what point does the congregation get up out of the pew and start asking questions—and expect answers? How long do they say, “God brought this man to us and we will trust that God has a plan”? Does the church body have the right to question the new path, especially after pouring so much of their heart and soul into the search process, or do they keep on trusting?

My personal feeling is that there is never enough open communication from Pastor to congregation. Church leaders are often given carte blanche to take whatever road looks the loveliest. Total control can give way to pride, which can break a man and the flock that was entrusted to him.

So…Preacher! Get off podium, and let the light of transparency shine into your plans. And, parishioners…get off the pew and shake away your fear. He’s just a man. It’s okay to question his decisions (at least it should be). Get off the pew!

We're Game Changers

2010-05-14T12:52:00.001-07:00

(This is a guest post. Written by Elizabeth Stoeckel. You can find her blog at lizbydesign.blogspot.com)

Last night some 25 women gathered at a beautiful home in the gorgeous “Van Ness Extension” neighborhood in my hometown. We came together for the purpose of brainstorming and thinking outside the box.

The girls who showed up last night share a dream—a desire to create a Valley wide Christian women’s group. It was inspiring to be in the company of so many amazing, talented, beautiful, and creative ladies—true game changers!

There’s a disturbing trend in churches today to separate and divide the church family into tiny little subgroups. Large gatherings, events, and Sunday school classes have given way to small groups. I don’t mean groups of say…50 people. I’m talking about clusters no larger than 8 or 10 people. Groups numbering more than that are encouraged to divide.

“The Church”—that is, the world church—has already been broken into denominations. The denominations then break off into factions. The Mennonite church, for example, has several sub-groups. There’s the (Old) Mennonite Church, the General Conference Mennonite Church, the Mennonite Brethren Church, and the Amish.

If I were a Baptist, I could choose to be a Southern Baptist, a General Baptist, a Calvinist, or a Seventh-Day-Baptist, just to name a few. Whether you consider yourself a liberal Christian, a conservative, or a legalist, there’s a church out there for you.

Further, we’ve divided ourselves over music, food, jewelry, make-up, and public education. Jesus called us one body. We fight, argue, gossip, condemn, and judge the very same people we share the pew with on Sunday morning.

Paul wrote this in Colossians 3:14-16 (NIV): And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God.

When people are divided they fight. Where there is unity, there is appreciation and respect. “United we stand, divided we fall” is more than just a clever cliché. It’s the truth!

So, we hope to gather thousands of women together from all over the Central Valley to support, love, encourage, and challenge one another. I hope California is ready to be nurtured and cared for in a whole new way!

Look out Central Valley. The girls are uniting! We’re gonna love on you big time—ready or not!

Seasons

2010-05-11T07:30:00.001-07:00

She was the church gossip. You know the kind—she’s usually on the church staff, or married to the youth pastor or sound guy. She doesn’t actually gossip, but she shares “prayer requests”.

“Please pray for Kathy. You know her husband is having an affair.” “Join me in praying for the Johnson family. Their kids are out of control.” People called her “sensitive” to the needs of others. Oh brother! Karin was the Queen of Gossiptown!

The busybody was quick to pigeonhole people. She made swift and ugly assumptions about innocent parishioners. She’d overhear a portion of a sentence, or a snippet of conversation and she’d identify in the speaker the weakest of character traits, and focus on it and it alone.

Karin told me I was a “control freak” because I expressed a simple opinion. She characterized church attendees as “weak”, “sluts”, or “home wreckers”. Very often she had only the smallest sliver of a fact or rumor on which to build her opinions.

When Karin moved to another state, a friend of mine called her “dog poop on the shoes of our town”. It was time to wipe her memory from the soles of our feet. Her gossip literally ruined lives.

I recently received a Facebook friend request from Karin. The social networking site has linked people that might never have reason or opportunity to connect otherwise. Last week she posted as her status update something that caught my eye. “You cannot judge a tree or a person by only one season. Don’t let the pain of one season destroy the joy of all the rest.”

It has been several years since I spent any real time with Karin. I’m going to take her advice. I am choosing to not judge her by what might have been a season of gossip. Perhaps she’s trying to do better. She may, in fact, be working on her propensity to make rash judgments and assumptions.

Here’s to new seasons! Here’s to new joy!