Church Discipline or Public Humiliation

Over the past year there has been a lot of controversy surrounding Mars Hill Church in Seattle, Washington. There was a public brouhaha surrounding the dismissal of a church member named Andrew. 

The facts of the case have been made public. Andrew admitted to his fiancé that he cheated on her. As one would expect, she was devastated. Realizing that he needed to be held accountable, he sought out his "community group" leader, confessed to him, and asked for prayer. Oh, and Andrew admitted to having sex with his fiancé.

From there, all hell broke loose. The community leader told other leaders and the pastor eventually learned about Andrew's indiscretion. The entire church body was informed that there was a "wolf" in the flock and that he was under official church discipline. The members were told to shun Andrew - do not eat with him, do not talk with him, and walk away when you see him in public.

I realize that this is old news to many of you, but I want to address how Mars Hill Church defends its actions in a blog post:

In talking about the difference between confession and repentance, we should first distinguish true confession from various false forms of confession. True confession is agreeing with God that we’ve sinned and naming the sin as God would name it. An example of false confession might be to give partial details in a way that glosses over the severity of the sin. In that case, one’s hidden intention is actually not to bring the sin out into the light, but rather to offer true words as a decoy that keeps the underlying sin in the dark. In any case, confession amounts to bringing sin out into the light by telling the truth about it. To confess is to only to speak of a sin; to repent is to follow up a confession with change.

Mars Hill clearly makes a practice of judging a man's heart, intentions, and truth telling. How dare they claim spiritual authority equal to or above that of God. What happened to "judge not, lest you be judged"?  

I know EXACTLY how Andrew feels. I was accused of having nefarious intentions behind completely innocent actions. One accusation made against me was this goody, "You saw me walking toward you in the hall at church and you turned and walked the other way. I have no choice but to assume you're jealous of me." Crazy? Well, judging the intentions of another person is not only crazy, but also wrong on every level.

I have no patience for pompous Pharisees who practice public humiliation. Jesus went to the woman at the well when she was completely alone. In another instance, men were ready to stone a prostitute, but Jesus silently began writing in the dirt and one by one, the men dropped their stones. It has been surmised that Jesus was writing the sins of the men in the sand. He didn't publicly humiliate or call people out - he just gently reminded them of their own past weaknesses.

Get off the pew of public humiliation. Stop shunning, and get back to some good old fashioned relationship building. Get off the pew (and away from Mars Hill).

P.S. Andrew, wherever you are, I hope you're doing well and that you know how very much God loves you.

Brenda's Mom is Crazy

Brenda and Eric are 28 years old and have been friends since kindergarten. Eric is gay.

The other day Eric said to me, "Brenda's mom is crazy." He told his story.

Whenever Eric goes to visit Brenda, her mom greets him at the door and then slips into a nearby room where he can hear her pray. She prays for Eric's salvation and for the spirit of homosexuality to flee his body. She prays loudly enough for him to hear her!

How sad it is that Eric uses the word, "crazy" to describe this Christian mom. There are so many other words that seem a bit more Christ-like. Loving. Kind. Warm. Authentic. Accepting. Hospitable. Those are a few that come to mind immediately.

I don't begrudge Brenda's mom for praying, but instead of loving Eric unconditionally, she's driving him away and perpetuating the ugly stereotyping of all Christians as gay-bashers and homophobes.

Get off the pew and recognize that we should be known by our love. Get off the pew.

Mark Driscoll - shame on you!

Mark Driscoll's comments are disgusting and shameful.

If people don't agree with his vision, he has no trouble running them over.  He goes so far as to say that "by God's grace" there will be a "mountain" of dead bodies behind the Driscoll/Mars Hill Church bus.

Thank you Fighting for the Faith for speaking out.

A Hole In Our Gospel

I've been brought to my knees as I've been reading the powerful book, "The Hole In Our Gospel" by Richard Stearns (president of World Vision).

Martin Luther King Jr. said, "In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." He was referring to the white pastors and the white Christian church.  Surely, they would stand with him and defend him as the black/white issues of the day were issues of mercy and justice - things Jesus stood for.

But the white church was largely silent. In fact, some pastors called Dr. King a "tool of the devil". Of course, some white believers stood for and with Dr. King, but the silence of his "friends" was deafening.

When the AIDS crisis first began making headlines, the Church stayed silent for way to long.  Those not silent were largely critical. Some said AIDS was God's curse on the homosexual community, and the disease was what they deserved.  Where was the compassion, the love, the mercy? 

I'm happy to report that more and more believers are rising up to meet the physical, spiritual, and emotional needs of AIDS patients, but we are still falling so short. We fall short in taking care of the hungry, the poor, the uneducated, and the broken.

There are hungry and homeless Christ-followers living in abject poverty all over the world. They are our brothers and sisters - they are God's kids. We sit here in America on our fat wallets and in our comfortable homes and we do little. 

Here are some startling statistics as outlined in "The Hole In Our Gospel":

  $168 billion - The extra money available if all American churchgoers tithed.

  $705 billion - Amount Americans spend on entertainment and recreation.
  $179 billion - Amount spent by teenagers ages 12-17 (2006).
  $65 billion - Amount we spend on jewelry.
  $58 billion - Amount spent on state lottery tickets (2007).
  $39.5 billion - Total U.S.-government foreign assistance budget for the world.
  $31 billion - Amount sent on pets (2003).
  $13 billion - Amount spent by Americans on cosmetic surgery (2007).
  $5 billion - Total overseas ministries income to 700 Protestant mission agencies, including denominational, interdenominational, and independent agencies (2005).

Further, "Universal primary education for children would cost just $6 billion; the cost to bring clean water to most of the world's poor, an estimated $9 billion; and basic health and nutrition for everyone in the world, $13 billion." - A Hole In Our Gospel

We've got to get off the pew and stop sitting silently in our big fancy churches. We complain about music and preaching styles. We gossip about the people whose kids are rebelling. We do all this while our brothers and sisters in Christ who happen to live on the other side of the world (or maybe next door) are dying at an alarming rate - from preventable diseases like MALNUTRITION!! It is shameful.

GET OFF THE PEW OF SILENCE!

Jesus Wants A Chocolate Bar?

There are no words.

Missing Out on the Good Stuff

There was a communion service on Sunday.

Communion (or The Lord's Supper), as most of you know, is a time during the church service when we are reminded of Christ's sacrifice for us. We drink some wine (or grape juice) to represent Jesus' spilt blood, and we eat a tiny bland, dry cracker to represent his broken body. I confess that I have always wished for a better tasting cracker.

But I digress.

Several years ago, one of the "church ladies" gossiped and judged me right out of the church. She shook her little finger of spiritual condemnation my way and convinced one of the leaders that I was not worthy to play a tiny servant role in ministry. The job went to her.

Time has gone on. She no longer has the position of authority that she once held, and I've come back to the congregation - much to her chagrin. Oh well.

When the communion elements were being passed, I saw immediately that the church lady's husband was serving the people in my section of seats. I've got to say that I was pleased and amazed at how God was working things out. This man was going to serve me. What better way for reconciliation and love, then to be served by someone who had once opposed me?

When the man got to me - grape juice and crackers in hand - he went past me to the other end of the pew. He ignored me, and refused to serve me.

A server from the other side of the aisle crossed over and gave me the wine and bread.

It made me sad to know that years have gone by, and this man still (apparently) harbors...I don't know...something toward me. Is it anger? Bitterness? Guilt? Judgment? Pride? I can't possibly know what motivated him to pass me by, but I know it wasn't right.

The Church uses 1 Corinthians, chapter 11 as an admonishment to believers about the condition one's heart must be in to be worthy to take communion. I suppose the plate passer might justify not serving me if he holds anything against me. I say that NONE of us are TRULY worthy to take or to serve communion, and he missed an opportunity for heart restoration.

Look, Jesus washed Peter's feet, even knowing that Peter would betray him. Jesus set the example for us. We serve - even those with whom we disagree. We serve.

I'm very disappointed that the church lady's husband missed the opportunity to smile, make eye contact, and take a baby step toward reconciliation. I think God was trying to do a great thing on Sunday, and the man missed out.

Get off the pew and quit holding on to past junk. Let God do the good stuff. He wants so much good stuff for us. Why won't we let him?

Get off the pew!

I Think You Should Leave

My friend was going through a very difficult divorce - not that every divorce isn't difficult. It certainly wasn't something she desired, and the breakdown of her marriage was devastating.

My friend had raised her kids in the church, and the whole family had been members of a particular congregation for many years.

One day she got a call from her long-time pastor. He said, "Now that you and your husband are getting a divorce, we think it's better that one of you leave. We think it should be you."

Divorcing couples go to court to decide who gets custody of kids, dogs, furniture, goldfish - even friends. Shouldn't the decision to stay or leave a church family be left up to the husband and wife as well?

What are pastors thinking when they do this? Seriously. I'd love to know. What Biblical truth or standard do they use when they do this kind of thing? It's bad enough that children have to walk through the dissolution of their family, but now they have to choose whether to stay at Dad's church, or go someplace new with mom?

Kids are watching you pastors. They're watching and listening. How can you preach grace from the pulpit, but fail to show grace to a hurting part of the body? I'm guessing my friend needed her church family to put their arms around her and hold her hand during the rough waters of divorce. Why would you push her out of the boat without so much as a flotation device?

I think we should keep the broken and hurting as close to us as possible. They need us to pray for them, love them, and be intimately aware of their needs. We need to be part of the healing - not part of the pain.

Get off the pew of judgment, and extend the hand of grace and love.

Get off the pew!

Smoke Pot With God

Los Angeles, California. As California goes, so goes the rest of the country (so they say).

A Christian Educator

"Diana" is a dedicated teacher. She's exactly the kind of teacher you'd want your kids to have in the classroom. She's kind, smart, disciplined, and she genuinely cares about students. Diana loves Jesus and is a woman of deep unabashed faith.


Christian Educators Association International (CEAI) is an organization whose mission is (according to their website) "To Encourage, Equip and Empower Educators according to Biblical Principles." We are the only professional association for Christians who are called to serve in public schools.


After Diana spent a weekend at a CEAI retreat, she was excited to become a part of the organization. It can be tough to be a Christian teacher in today's public schools. We live in a politically correct world where fear keeps us from expressing our opinions - even when the law provides us the support to do so.


Inspired and fired up after the encouraging retreat weekend, Diana decided to plug into the resources made available to her through CEAI. She hoped to build lasting relationships with other like-minded Christian educators.


But there was a problem. Diana is gay.


The CEAI leadership opened their arms to Diana, but they said they were afraid the other members might be uncomfortable if Diana were at Bible studies or small group gatherings. You know, when I'm in a room with other people, I never think twice about what they do or do not do in the bedroom, so I can't imagine what could be "uncomfortable" about hanging out with Diana!


Christian teachers need all the support, encouragement, and legal know-how they can gather. They can be woefully ill prepared to go toe to toe with a bully principal who tries to hush their faith in the classroom.


Why can't we come together because we love Jesus and He loves us? Let's keep our eyes on the commonalities and shared beliefs. Let us hold one another's hand as we navigate the sometimes scary and confusing walk of faith.


Get off the pew. Take someone's hand!   

God Speaks via my Television

I wake up this morning and decide it's just too cold to get out of bed. So, I scootch (according to the Urban Dictionary, it's a real word) further under the covers, and then turn on the television. I'm thinking I might catch a bit of news before the Saturday morning cartoons take over the airwaves.

My Vizio monitor snaps to attention, and THIS is what I see on the TV screen:

Really? Wow, it's awfully early, and I'm not fully awake, but okay! Let's go. I mean, God needs ME!

Now I'm tuned in to the fact that a bad recording of an old hymn is playing in the background. The screen shot changes. I see this:

God needs me to "Broadcast Nonstop Prayers Into Every Home...Every Where". Every home? Every where? Shouldn't "Every Where" be one word?

Okay, now I'm up. God needs me!