One toke over the line...

Earlier this year I was in Los Angeles. On my way to the airport, I spotted this sign in front of a church.



That's one way to get 'em in the pew. I wonder if they served snacks.

Voting Day

Question…on voting day, do you care who or what James Dobson endorses?

Many voters color in the oval next to the name on the ballot solely because of the single letter that comes at the end of the candidate's name—“R” or “D”.

A few weeks before each election my extended family picks up a copy of the Christian Voter Guide and we gather for a “who would Jesus vote for” party. I’ll be honest—I’ve been known to **gasp** throw my support behind the unsanctioned candidate.

The primary election was held today in my state. One of the congressional candidates used to be the mayor of a nearby town. He’s an outspoken Christian who garnered the support of Focus on the Family founder James Dobson.

The man who followed in the candidate’s mayoral footsteps is now a radio commentator who also happens to be a vocal Christian. The radio show’s host has nothing nice to say about his predecessor and congressional hopeful. In fact, he’s been down right nasty, calling the former mayor a liar and a thief.

Christians stand on Biblical truth, armed with the sword and the shield, and we come out swinging. Christians can be so arrogant sometimes!

I wonder—if the two Christian men were in a political race against one another, which one would win the endorsement of religious leaders?

Should a candidate, proposition, or ballot measure be pulpit fodder? Is it okay for a pastor to offer his opinion or advice on political matters? I’ve known church leaders who feel very strongly about staying out of this controversial arena, and others who feel a duty to inform—even going so far as to put up proposition signs around the church campus.

Look, we have an obligation to vote and to vote our conscience. We ought not be sheep who blindly follow the spiritual leaders. God gave me the intelligence and wherewithal to gather the available information and then to cast a discerning vote.

Don’t be sheep. Get off the pew—ask questions, educate yourself, and vote with wise confidence. Get off the pew!

Third time's the charm.

A couple of nights ago we went to a wedding reception. Don and Deanne were first engaged in 1980, but they broke up and married other people. It’s so great to see them together now—happy and looking forward to sharing many years of happy love.

When we arrived at the reception Don’s dad hugged us, thanked us for coming, and said, “Someone from the church has got to reach out and love my son.” His words broke my heart.

Don’s first marriage ended when his wife left him for another man. Everyone who knew the couple was shocked and saddened by the completely unexpected turn.

When a couple divorces they have to divide the furniture, wall hangings, dishes, and towels. They argue over custody of the kids, dogs, cats, and goldfish. If all goes well, each partner walks away with half the shared physical assets and the kids continue to thrive.

The saddest element of divorce is the division of friendships. Perhaps it wouldn’t be so awful if the husband and wife could sit with a mediator and weigh the pros and cons of every person in their life, then amicably agree to split time and custody. It doesn’t work that way.

Generally speaking, friends and family choose sides and everyone dons weapons fashioned from gossip, assumptions, lies, and judgment. It’s a terrible phenomenon and there are no winners.

The church supported Don in his divorce. After all, adultery is a church sanctioned reason for ending a marriage. Don remarried a year or two later and he stayed in the church’s good graces. That all ended when he divorced his second wife.

After his second divorce Don lost most of the remainder of his friends. His pastor warned him to “never step foot” in the church again.

"I hate divorce," says the LORD God of Israel, "and I hate a man's covering himself with violence as well as with his garment," says the LORD Almighty. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith. 1 Malachi 2:16 (NIV)

There’s no doubt God hates divorce, but I know that I know that God LOVES the divorcee. Loving a friend and standing by him or her when their marriage falls apart is (I believe) what God calls us to do. Divorce is not a contagious disease. You won’t need antibiotics if you get too close to someone suffering the ravages of a marital break-up—I promise.

Sin happens when we break fellowship with God. We then suffer through our anger, bitterness, depression, and all manner of emotional distress. The sadness is magnified when we suffer alone and the people who should be Jesus with skin on abandon us in our hour of need.

Do you know someone who is out of fellowship with God or with the church? Get off the pew, pick up the phone, and reconnect. Send them a card or letter—anything to extend a hand of love and support. You won’t get infected, I promise you! Get off the pew!

Nepotism in The Church

Nepotism is alive and well—especially in The Church. Nepotism is defined as “Favoritism shown to relatives or close friends by those with power or influence.”

One of the mega-churches in town has all the members of one family on its payroll. The church hired the music minister’s son after he was fired from another church. The second son is the children’s ministries pastor, and his father-in-law is also on the staff.

At the same mega-church, a board member's son was hired to be the Junior High School Pastor. Unfortunately, that young man has never attended college and he is woefully under qualified to teach young people and lead a department. That is nepotism at its worse—and a bad way to run a business.

We’re certainly not alone in this practice, as there are companies all over the world—large and small—that are filled with co-workers who share the same DNA. There are certainly good reasons for doing business this way.

Sons and daughters are groomed from birth to be the perfect employee. I think of real estate mogul, Donald Trump’s family. The three eldest Trump kids all work for their father. I feel sure that “The Donald” saw to it that those kids got the education and experience they needed to be perfect vice presidents for the Trump organization.

Hey, putting your kids on the payroll saves a lot of time and energy that would have been wasted interviewing potential employees. When a father hires his son he can wave all those pesky background checks, and the exorbitant fees that go with them. After all, Dad knows about most of the skeletons in the family closet.

Kids follow in the footsteps of their parents all the time. It’s natural, of course, since we inherit strengths and talents from our Mom and Dad. Those traits lead us to jobs for which we are a good fit. In addition, we’re all drawn to the familiar—such as the family business.

Hollywood has its famous acting families. There’s the Barrymore family, Kirk Douglas and his boys, and Lloyd Bridges, who along with his actress wife, Dorothy raised actor sons Beau and Jeff. These are just a few of so many possible examples.

Christianity has its royal families too. Billy Graham’s kids Anne and Franklin have followed their dad into the family business, as have the kids of Robert Schuller, Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson, and John Hagee.

I don’t snub the practice of nepotism in church hiring practices completely, but I do believe that those in leadership need to be careful. We must be very sure that the people on the payroll are the best possible man or woman for the job. We ought to hold ourselves to a high accountability—higher than most.


I’ve asked this question before…what is your church’s business model? We represent God to the world, and we should be setting the standard. Get off the pew!

Writing Notes

Have you ever written a note to your pastor, worship leader, or church board? Christians love to write notes—especially nasty notes!

It seems the worship leader gets the bulk of the condemning comments. We think we aren’t singing enough hymns, we complain about the horns being too loud, or we lament the “7-11” praise songs. Those are the worship tunes wherein we sing the same seven words eleven times.

We criticize the church board for how and where they spend money, we chastise the pastor for preaching too long (hey, we’ve got to get to Applebee’s), and we fuss over which version of the Bible is God-approved.

What do all these complaints have in common? They are focused on us—me, me, me!

The big bulk of the ugly notes received by pastors, worship leaders, board members, and church staff are motivated by a selfish desire to personalize church. We’re not always interested in seeing the big picture. Rather, we focus on the little self-portrait we’ve painted of our perfect church—with us in the center.

I have to use readers—the cheap little glasses that help me see the words in books, newspapers, and the like. They’re great for close up reading, but are completely useless for seeing things in the distance. Everything beyond the stretch of my arm is blurry and out of focus.

Are you looking at church through a close-up lens that prevents you from seeing the big picture? Are you so busy critiquing every element of each Sunday service that you have lost sight of the purpose of the church?

The church is one body made up of many parts. We represent many and varied tastes in music, literature, clothing style, and entertainment. Likewise, we represent a cornucopia of ideas—thoughts about how best to “do” church.

We should, however, have one purpose—to reach and serve the world for Jesus.

Take off the rose-colored glasses that keep you focused on your here and now self. It’s okay to offer suggestions and to let your opinions and heart be known. I encourage you, however, to check your motive before submitting that written critique. Are you concerned about something the church is doing that is contradictory to the word of God, or simply in opposition to your own personal taste? If it’s the latter…you might want to put your pen away.

Satan works hard to discourage a church staff and its volunteers—BELIEVE ME! He’s most successful when he uses parishioners to deliver the heavy oppositional blows.

So, put the pen back in your pocket. If you don’t like the way something in your church is being done, get off the pew and volunteer to serve. Get off the pew!

Come As You Are

I wonder if the church is ready for this kind of a "come as you are" campaign. Check out this video.

Thoughtful.

How could you?

“How could you turn your back on your Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who gave you such a wonderful family?” Boy, mothers sure know how to pour on the guilt.

Whether it’s the family we were born into, or the family we inherited when we gave our heart to the Lord—sometimes we butt heads with the people we love and care about. The mere fact that I disagree with my loved ones now and then does not, by any stretch of the imagination, mean that I’ve turned my back on my Lord.

I can understand, however, the temptation to judge a person’s heart. We tend to hold to certain traditions and expectations and if others don’t look the part, we judge them. It’s a part of the human condition.

The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7b (NIV)

I’m reminded of a conversation I had with a co-worker a year or so ago. One of the church’s former pastors was forced to resign after it came to light that he was having an affair. There was so much sadness and brokenness.

Because of the affair, two homes were destroyed, and a church family was shattered. When pastors fall (and they sometimes do), parishioners choose sides, faith is shaken, and heartbreak spreads like a virus through the body.

The former pastor’s name came up when my co-worker was recounting to me some of the biggest challenges the church has faced in her 30 years of membership. “That pastor is still unrepentant.” She seemed sure of the condition of the man’s heart.

“How do you know that?” I asked. She answered with authority. “It’s obvious.”

I didn’t press her for an explanation, as I really didn’t want to get caught in a gossip-fest with my cubicle mate. But I wondered what criteria she might be using to judge the man.

A few days later I was visiting with my sister-in-law when she told me that the disgraced former pastor had been the guest speaker at her church. She beamed as she recounted his story of sin, restoration, healing, and forgiveness.

I went on-line so I could download the podcast of his message. It was encouraging, powerful, and so inspirational. There is life after death and destruction, and the pastor was living in victory over sin. Amazing.

Whatever criteria my friend was using to judge the former sinner’s heart, her conclusion was wrong. In the same way, it is wrong to assume a person has turned away from God just because they disagree with a fellow believer now and again.

Are you sitting on the pew of finger pointing and name-calling? Well, get off the pew! God sees what the human eye cannot see. Sometimes we just have to trust the fact that He’s at work. Now get off the pew!

Unconditional Love, pt. 2

On Wednesday I wrote about my friendship with a young man who happens to be gay. I pointed out that my gay friends do not see the Christian community as a group of people who love them unconditionally.

I’m speaking in generalities here. I know that not ALL Christians separate themselves from homosexuals, but it’s so much more common than it ought to be. I know many gay believers who love God and desire to honor Him.

The picture I used a couple of days ago is the same one I’m using today. A copy of this painting hung in my grandparents’ home when I was a little girl, and over the years I’ve seen the picture on walls in many a Sunday school classroom. In the picture we see Jesus knocking on a door and waiting to be let in.

Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me. Revelation 3:20 (NIV)

So, before Jesus goes door to door, do you think He pulls out His address book of hearts? Maybe He says something like, “Oh, I see this place belongs to a gay man named Steve. I won’t be knockin’ on that door!”

Can you picture Jesus calling on a hurting woman who asks if she could bring her girlfriend along? “What?” Jesus seems surprised. “The Father didn’t tell me you were gay!”

I’m not here to debate the rightness or wrongness of gay relationships. But if you believe homosexuality is a sin, why is it treated differently than any other sin? Do you not have friends who lie, steal, cheat, commit adultery, drink too much, use drugs, or gossip to excess?

Sin is sin is sin is sin!

Jesus hung out with prostitutes, murderers, liars, thieves, cheaters, and dead guys! We have the awesome opportunity—and I believe, responsibility—to be Jesus with skin on. Jesus never failed to show unconditional love and perfect grace. God gives us the power to do the same.

Don’t get me wrong…Jesus doesn’t want anyone to remain in sin. During His life, Jesus showed people God’s love and they wanted to have what He had. He went to where the hurting hearts lived, and He loved them.

Christians have been given a bad name because of the ugly behavior of a few. Reverend Fred Phelps and his Westboro Baptist Church picket funerals of dead soldiers because they believe the fighting men and women died supporting a country that defends homosexuality. They believe that “God’s hatred is one of His holy attributes”.

People like Fred Phelps and the Westboro Baptist Church ought to be ashamed of themselves, and we should be rising up against their homophobic and anti-Semitic hate and rhetoric.

The antics of that group of extremists is just one of the many ugly happenings we should stand against. Why would anyone want anything to do with the God we profess to emulate when we can be so judgmental and condemning?

Get off the pew of passivity and denial. Stop making excuses for ugly Christians and love—really love all God’s kids! We need to be Jesus with skin on! Get off the pew!

Unconditional Love

Facebook is responsible for connecting me with many long ago friends. Oh sure, it’s spawned its share of drama, but that’s because Facebook brings out the “junior high” in everyone. But I digress.

Today I had lunch with a friend I’ve reconnected with through Facebook. He’s smart, talented, kind, conservative, and he just so happens to be gay.

It was great to catch up with my old friend. We got to know each other maybe 13 years ago when we worked on a show together. He was so young when I met him and he’s grown into a kind, hardworking young man who’s faced challenges and sadness with grace.

My friend told me something I find heartbreakingly sad. He told me I was the only Christian he’d ever met who he felt truly liked him. He told me he remembers a time when I had his back and he appreciates me.

In 1994 I worked with a fabulous woman who happened to be gay. She said words very close to the ones I heard today—she told me I was one of the only Christians she’d ever met who treated her with respect and kindness. She told me she genuinely liked me, and she sensed that I felt the same about her. I did.

I find it incredibly sad that my gay friends do not readily see Christians as a community who love people unconditionally. These two people do not exactly live in a bubble. I mean it’s not like I’m the only believer they’ve ever met. But I’m the “only Christian” to ever love them—unconditionally love them.

Get off the pew of hate and love your neighbor. What would Jesus do? Who would Jesus love? Get off the pew!

God Made Me Do It

I got an email this morning from Marc Hartzman, author of the book, “God Made Me Do It”. This is the first I’ve heard of this book, so I can’t comment on the quality of the material, but I can say—it looks very interesting.

I think it takes a great deal of confidence (maybe arrogance) to say, “God told me_____” (fill in the blank). I absolutely know what it means to hear that tiny voice in my heart or my head and to know I’ve heard the voice of God. But, I’m very careful about with whom I share.

In fact, I won’t even let myself fully embrace “the voice” until I’ve prayed about it, made sure the words lines up with the Bible, and I’ve talked about it with a trusted Christian mentor. I’ve never been given a prophesy detailing what someone else is supposed to do, although the Holy Spirit has given me profound wisdom and knowledge to help me deal with certain others in my life.

I wrote a post several months ago called, "Truth and Prophecy". It was written a few months before Oral Roberts passed away. In the post I recounted Reverend Roberts encounter with the 900 foot tall Jesus, and other prophecies. He was famous for his "God told me" statements.

Marc’s email reminded me of a story told several years ago by the Worship Pastor of a large church. He said he was in the hallway one Sunday morning and a parishioner stopped him and said, “God told me that if I saw you this morning I was to share this with you. I feel that we are wrongly leaving the old hymns behind. God wants you to sing more hymns during our worship time.”

The music leader said he thanked the woman for her comment and encouragement and he continued on his way through the hall to his office. Just as he unlocked the door, another church member approached him.

“I prayed about something this morning, and I knew that if I saw you, I was to share this.” The pastor’s ears perked up and he was listening. Maybe this was confirmation from the Lord about the hymns. Okay. The man went on, “God wants us sing more modern worship songs. He’s trying to reach more seekers.”

Wow! What does God want? Hymns or hip and new worship songs?

First of all, just hang out in the hall for a few minutes, and the music pastor will eventually make his way into your path. Therefore, claiming that God only wanted you to share your prophecy if you “saw” the pastor sounds a little fishy. You’re gonna see the worship leader in the hall on Sunday morning!

Secondly, we need to be very careful that we aren’t using God to carry out our own personal agenda. What’s wrong with saying, “Hey Pastor, I really love the old hymns, and I’d like to sing more of them on Sunday morning”? Or, “the new worship songs are just awesome. Let’s sing more of those!”

Get off the pew and be more discerning. I have no doubt that God uses that still small voice to stir my heart. Sometimes the words are loud and strong. “Hey! Get off the pew!"